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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Police (10/12/06)
Fasten The Deadbolt

There was music playing as Marie entered the room. She was late. The R&R (rules and regulations) police officers who were constantly on-guard in her mind, nagged. “Better to go home than be late.” If she hadn’t promised her friend, Susan, she would be there, she would have stayed home. “I'll visit for one night only.” There was an empty seat next to Susan. She took it as Susan handed her a songbook.

The singing ended. Susan explained the group was a safe place to come together and share their lives. Again the R&R spoke. “Safe? You can’t trust anyone.”

Each woman took a turn talking about their week. One woman cried as she talked about desperately seeking employment. Susan stopped the meeting and asked the women to gather around and pray for her. A few women went over and quietly prayed. “What is this?” The R&R officer shouted. “This is corny. It’s not real. It’s just a religious show.” Marie shifted her weight and thought about what she’d say when it was her turn. The leader told her she didn’t have to answer the first week. Relief! "Gotta keep things private.” Whispered R&R.

She had been a Christian for a long time but couldn’t relate to this kind of Christianity. There was a sweet sense that the ladies truly loved each other. Why? Why did they pray aloud? Why did some women raise their hands during worship? There were more questions than answers. R&R spoke up. “Stay away. You don’t belong.” She agreed and before leaving, she told Susan she wouldn’t be returning.

She got in her car and headed home. Marie had never met people who were honest and then prayed out loud for each other. Although it was uncomfortable, there was something strangely attractive about the meeting.

She thought of the times the R&R police had guided her. She remembered the first time. Yes, it was when she was a little girl. She was punished for looking behind her in church. “You don’t ever look behind you. It’s rude!” Her aunt had yelled in the car afterward. Memories flooded her mind. She then thought about the girl, Amanda, who had tried to befriend her and had taken her to church the year she went to university. She had gone once, but it was weird. People sang and waved flags and clapped and raised their hands. They were not reverent in God’s house. Her aunt would roll over in her grave if she knew that Marie had been in such a place. The R&R saved her from backsliding and warned her never to go back.

She pulled over to the shoulder of the road and wept. The words Amanda spoke to her so long ago came back to her. “Marie, the people here are happy to be in God’s presence. You have nothing to fear. Religious people reject. These people are not religious. They love Jesus and they invite Him into every aspect of their lives. It doesn’t matter if they are at work, at home or at the grocery store. Their relationship with Jesus is a daily, living partnership.

As she sat in the car, she felt a stirring of wind around her. “That is funny.” Whispered Marie. “The windows are not open.” Unexpectedly, she heard an audible voice. One stronger than the R&R voices. One that drowned them out.

“My child. I love you. Draw close to me. Don’t listen to the other voices Daughter. Send them away. Fasten the deadbolt and listen only to Me.”

Marie felt peace wash over her entire being. Her heart stirred and she continued to cry, but for a different reason. “I want to be free, God. I want to be free.” She sobbed. “So it shall be, my child.”

For the first time in years, it was totally quiet. Marie went home and slept through the night without any nightmares. She woke up refreshed and invigorated.

She sat with her coffee and she put on a praise CD as she opened her Bible. Afterward, she reached for the phone to call Susan. She knew she had a lot to learn - and a lot to unlearn. With God’s help and with the help of Susan and that sweet prayer group, Marie knew today was a new day. She felt her right hand open and raise toward Heaven as Susan answered on the third ring.
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This article has been read 879 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Jan Ackerson
10/20/06
Your last sentence really clinched it for me.
Keith McDonald
10/20/06
A wonderful portrayal of someone coming to Christ. I will show it to my granddaughter!
Phyllis Inniss 
10/21/06
Good article. There are so many things we have to learn and unlearn, but with God all things are possible.
Bonnie Derksen
10/22/06
I really enjoyed this writing!
Your perspective and POV,the idea of the voices in Marie's head being the R&R police... very creative.
I loved your line "One stronger than the R&R voice".
Having walked through healing in this regard I love that, if I let Him, my Father's voice will be louder.
Thanks for this and keep on keeping on with the writing.
Sharlyn Guthrie
10/22/06
A little tip that was given to me early in my writing experience was to avoid starting sentences with the word "there". So I am passing that advice on. Your first sentence could easily be re-worded. That being said, I enjoyed your story tremendously, and was so glad that I read it to its conclusion. Great job!