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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: End (02/13/06)
She did not see Him or hear His voice, but she heard the sound of His footsteps...and that was enough! She immediately sprinted down the path, raced through the maze of azalea bushes, jumped over a small stream then quickly scooted under the low hanging branches of an Evergreen, hiding her naked body in the deep foliage underneath.

Gasping for breath and trembling with fear...she waited! Waited and listened for the sound of His footsteps, the sound of His voice, and the certainty of death that would END her life.

She had recognized those footsteps immediately This was no stranger just casually walking in her neck of the woods by accident! No! She knew him well! He came here every day, usually in the cool of the day, looking for her and her husband - and today was no exception!

As she lay there shivering against the cold damp ground, she began to sob. She tried desperately to stifle the sound, but it was too late...He had heard her!

"Why did you hide from me?", He asked, as He reached down to take her hand and help her up from her hiding place.

One trembling hand reached out from beneath the foliage taking the Master's hand, while the other clutched a handful of leaves she had hastily tied together to hide her unclothed body: "Because I, ah.. I.. ah, had no clothes", she stammered, "and I was afraid."

* * *

It is obvious to you by now that I am referring to that fateful day in the Garden of Eden when Adam and Eve sinned and brought an end to Man's immortality.

In this Genesis story we also read about the first "point-the-finger-of-blame game", which still continues today. When God asked Adam about eating the fruit, Adam said, "It was the woman you gave me, she gave me the fruit, and I did eat"; and when God asked Eve about it, she blamed the serpent, saying "It was the serpent who beguilled me....

"I was strolling along
'Neath the leaves of a tree
When I spotted a serpent
As wise as could be!

"So I lingered awhile
To hear him out;
And as I listened
I began to doubt.

"Now I will admit
I stayed for lunch,
Then took something home
For Adam to munch".

Excuses, excuses, excuses!

Eve didn't need to make all those empty excuses, for Man's Salvation had been planned from the very beginning, and that was finalized 2,000 years ago on an old rugged cross on Calvary. God's only begotten son took the blame upon Himself for Mankind's sin, and died for us, You and Me! "Greater love hath no man than this, that one lay down his life for his friends." (John 15:13 NIV)

Meanwhile, back to Eden......

The couple was evicted from their Garden home; but like the loving Father that God is, He did not send His children out into the world naked or in loosely sewn-together fig leaves; instead..."The Lord God made garments of skin for Adam and his wife, and clothed them." (Gen 3:21 NIV)

Just think! Adam and Eve left Eden wearing beautiful coats of skin, perhaps even made from the sacrifice of one of their own buddies - the leopard, fox or the mink - who just yesterday had romped and played with them in the plush, green grass back home. What a deep sense of sorrow it must have caused them to witness death for the first time...and the end of innocence.
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This article has been read 1619 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Lynda Schultz 
02/21/06
And "end" is needed here (pardon asked for the pun) in my opinion. I might suggest rearranging your last paragraphs and putting Christ's sacrifice as the last. This was very well done nonetheless. Congratulations.
Cassie Memmer
02/22/06
This is a nice rendition of the garden story. I especially love this line: "Why did you hide from me?", He asked, as He reached down to take her hand and help her up from her hiding place. It touched me, reminding me of His gentleness, though He knows all of my sin, He still comes to meet me, reaching out. I understand wanting to tie this up by ending with "the end of innocence" but I think I agree with Lynda, that you might want to reverse the order of that and Jesus' sacrifice. Very well done, I enjoyed reading this, and am thankful He lovingly desires to meet with us daily. Good job!
Marilyn Schnepp 
02/22/06
Since Adam & Eve did not WITNESS the death of Christ, I think the Author is referring to their sorrow at WITNESSING the first death...the death of an innocent animal to clothe them, that just yesterday had been their playmate and friend. Perhaps the Author could have been more specific in making this disctinction.
Jan Ackerson
02/22/06
I loved the little poem! And the first half, from Eve's POV, is very good. I think you can do away with everything from "Meanwhile..." Your climax is right before that, and packs a powerful punch. Good job.
Garnet Miller 
02/24/06
I agree with Jan. Everything after "Meanwhile..." takes something away from the piece. Without it, this is a well said devotional! Good article.
Cheryl Harrison
02/25/06
Good use of the topic. I loved the poem, especially this stanza:

"So I lingered awhile
To hear him out;
And as I listened
I began to doubt."

So true...when we linger in listening to anything but the voice of truth we begin to doubt.

It may be nit-picky, but you might reconsider the last stanza just a little bit... :o)

Adam was not at home...he was there with Eve. Just a thought. Good job! Keep writing.
Julianne Jones
02/26/06
I really enjoyed the first section and the way you told the story of the Fall. I actually wondered if Eve could have used the poem in talking to God and trying to 'excuse' her sin. I thought that the second part was a totally different style to the first - it had some good thoughts, but my suggestion would be to stick to one style. Just my thoughts. But this was well-written and I can see lots of potential. Well done.
c clemons
02/26/06
I agree with one of the reviewers that said Adam was not at home but with her. Other nit-picky point is that God spoke to Adam not Eve. Adam was the head, God will always come to the head first. Just a couple of things to correct in case you want to publish.
Sally Hanan
02/27/06
I liked the first section the most - it was well done; your teaching bits don't fit the flow really well, and the take-away feeling would be much sweeter without being talked to.
Jan Kamp
03/06/06
The first part is very moving; I love it when Bible characters are brought to life this way. I think (as someone else pointed out) that the second half is too abrupt a change. Perhaps you could integrate the poem and your "teaching" into the story - from the perspective of the characters rather than your own.