Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Control (01/30/06)
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TITLE: Letting Go (ii) | Previous Challenge Entry
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02/04/06 -
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"You don't have to worry, Peg. You're fine. Everyone at our age has lapses of memory." Bob encouraged his wife of fifty years with a love for her that burst through his aging heart.
"I know, I know" she snapped back. "But why can't I remember the argument and then calling you a pea brain?" Tears welled up in her eyes and she felt ashamed for hurting this precious man whom she loved so much. Bob laughed, making light of the incident, but Peggy knew that his perception of the matter was colored by his devotion. She couldn't shrug off his lighthearted response and she started to fill with more fear as she recalled that morning, at the women's Bible study, when she had no recollection of an important decisionthat had been discussed at a previous meeting. A dear friend comforted her when she showed her confusion by saying, "Oh, Peggy, we're all forgetting things now at our age. It's nothing."
Two months before, the psychologist had recommended a brain scan. When Peggy returned to his office two days ago, for the test results, she sat across his desk rubbing her two hands together in a nervous pattern, fearing his diagnosis.
"The scan showed circulatory changes due to aging", the doctor announced in a placid tone of voice. Peggy avoided the question of dementia and settled on the safer term of lapses of memory. He understood her fears and worked around her questions in a way that comforted her anxious mind. She left his office with a good measure of satisfaction and hope.
These two feelings were diminished by today's incidents at home and at the Bible study. Her fear of losing control was heightened and Bob could sense it.
"Hey, Peg, let's take a ride into town and do some shopping" he offered her in a hopeful tone. "We can buy that new cookware you've wanted." In the past, a suggestion like that would have had Peggy running to their car. But, today was different.
"Okay, Bob" she answered without her usual enthusiasm. She knew he was placating her but she didn't want to offend him again.
Even while they sorted through the different sized pots and pans and made comments on what to buy, Peggy couldn't loose the heaviness that was suffocating her mood. It gnawed at her like a dog with a bone.
Outside the store Bob carried the bulky package of assorted cookware while Peggy followed behind. "Come on Peg, lets get this package home so we can try them out tonight." he suggested.
Peggy wished she could join in his enthusiasm, but nothing could dull her fears. In silent desperation she turned her troubled thoughts to the Lord and called out to Him in pain.
While Bob opened the back of the van to load the cumbersome package, Peggy turned and found herself reading a bumper sticker on a car parked across the way. To her astonishment, she read, "WHY WORRY - GOD'S IN CONTROL". She gasped and looking skyward with tears running down her cheeks, she murmured, "Oh, precious Lord, thankyou, thankyou."
Bob turned and said, "Hey hon, did you say something?"
Peggy smiled, wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand, and turning with a lighter step she answered, "Let's go Bob. You and I have some serious cooking to do."
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