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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: FRESH (04/29/21)
I want to tell you about a young man I once dated. I was twenty-five years old at the time, and he was twenty-seven. He was known as Steve and my name is Camille. I met Steve shortly after starting to work at a new company. We worked in the same office, and I was a new hire.

He asked for a date one day after we each discovered that the other was single. He asked, “Want to go out Saturday night?” “Where do you want to go?” I asked. He said he wanted to go to a movie. I said, “Yes.” He said he would pick me up at around 6 in the evening.

The entire evening he tried to get me to go to bed with him. He wanted some action, and he wasn’t shy about showing me he was full of passion and desire. Every time he tried to touch me inappropriately, I would brush his hand away or tell him to stop. This went on until I thought he finally got the message. By the time three hours had passed, I was exhausted and ready to call it a night. However, he had other plans.

He pulled over the side of the road and tried to seduce me. He tried to fondle my private parts and did everything he could think of to get me to want him. All of his efforts only made me dislike him more than I already did.

I said, “I want you to take me home, now!” I said it in as angry a voice as I could muster. I was praying inside and asking the Lord to get me out of this situation. Finally, this guy did take me home. He was infuriated with me and said he never wanted to go out with me again.

For months and years after this incident, I felt dirty and unworthy of the Lord’s love. I believed the Lord was angry with me. I asked the Lord to forgive me over and over, but I never felt truly forgiven. My thoughts were about to change, however.

One day I heard a sermon. The pastor talked about all of us having things in our past that we are not proud of. He said that just as the woman taken in adultery in John 8 was sorry for her sin, he was sure we were sorry for our sins as well. He asked all of us to come up to the front. There were about one hundred little pebbles all over a table, laid out neatly.

He said, “Each of you should take one stone, and then return to your seats.” So we each picked up one pebble and then sat down.
The pastor said, “Jesus told the religious leaders that whoever among them was without sin, they should be allowed to throw the first stone at the woman caught in adultery. Since none of these men were without sin, they dropped their stones and walked away.”

The pastor continued, “Look at your stone. Think about all of the things you have done wrong. In your mind, put all of your sins on that stone. After you have done that, look up at me.”

I put all of my sins, especially the worst one, on the stone. After I looked up, most of the other people were looking up as well. Several minutes later, everyone was looking up at the pastor.

He said, “Bring up your stone to the table. Pray and ask the Lord to forgive you for everything you have ever done wrong. Just like the men who put down their stones and walked away from the woman caught in adultery, put down your stones and walk away from all your sins. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you to walk away whenever you feel tempted. Now go back to your seats.”

I was able to feel forgiven after that illustration and sermon. Not completely, and especially not right away, but in time I was able to move on. I felt clean once again.


*This is based on a true story.
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This article has been read 361 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Lisa Marcelina
05/06/21
Beautiful testimony. Flowed nicely and message came across clear.

I know what it is like to feel unworthy of God's love, but he certainly has a way of letting us know He loves us no matter what.
Laura Manley
05/07/21
This was a good take on the word of the week. I personally don't believe this was your sin. You are the one who fought him off. It was definitely Steve's sin. This took courage to write and I commend you for it. There is at lest one place where you need to put a space for a new paragraph. Good work!
Holly Westefeld
05/08/21
I agree with Laura. One of Satan's most dispicable schemes is to try to keep us in bondage for others' sins, or our own that are long since under the blood of Christ.
Sue Botte 
05/09/21
Thank you for sharing the harrowing situation past. Be proud of insisting on your no; I did, and am still proud of it.
Keep writing.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 
05/12/21
I think it was brave to tell this story. I've had a couple of experiences like that and can totally relate to the feeling of shame. It took me years to realize it wasn't my sin. Unfortunately one of mine didn't turn out the same way with him leaving. I convinced myself I must be in love to reconcile what happened. It took me a long time to get over that. I only share to make you realize how brave you really were.
Your story could use a lot of tightening. For example I might suggest you edit the first two paragraphs like this:
After being hired in an office, Steve sauntered up to me and sat at the edge of my desk. "Wanna go out Saturday?" I felt flattered that this handsome man who was two years older asked me out. I smiled as I pretended to think about it. "Where will we go?"
He wiggled his eyebrows. "How about the movies?"
Notice I cut out a lot of details that the reader really doesn't need. I also added some body language to help paint a picture. Even though this is a true story, you can add these details even if you don't remember them exactly. It's creative nonfiction. Although the age, and the fact that you were a new hire are important to you, the reader doesn't need these details. Just by tightening it like this, it leaves you way more words to add more details, body language, and dialog later on.
I'm big about not telling the reader what you're going to say, instead just jump in and show them.
You've a powerful message about forgiveness. We often forget we need to forgive ourselves sometimes too. It's easy to look back and wonder why we didn't notice certain things or why we liked someone who wasn't right. You do a great job of showing that even when others may not have thought you sinned, you might still need to forgive yourself and let those internal dialog that beat yourself up be replaced with the truth that God loves you. Keep writing, you have a great foundation.
JANET JONES
05/13/21
I’m glad God is bringing you healing. I agree with others that the sin was Steve’s but I understand how shameful it can feel to be treated that way. As to the writing, I would not start a story with,” I want to tell you....” A better way might have been to start with: I met Steve shortly after starting to work at a new company. We worked in the same office. One day he approached me, “Hey Camille, are you free Saturday night?” That way the reader knows your name without you having to tell them directly. Keep writing, I enjoyed your story and the message.
Arlene Baker
05/20/21
I agree with the above comments. Let the reader use their own imagination to fill in unnecessary details. Start with a stronger hook and eliminate passive verbs. This story has a strong message that needs told!