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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Red (10/01/09)
A Crisp Red Reminder


Hast thou not known? Hast thou not heard, that the everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth, fainteth not neither is weary? there is no searching of his understanding. He giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength.
…Isaiah 4-:28-29


I must’ve caught some dreadful flu when at the grocery store with Mary. Just let me lie here and rest for a while. Remembering the crisp autumn mornings of years gone by, the colorful drifting of the leaves so picturesque caused me to linger long. I picture Mary and me walking hand in hand picking up the prettiest red leaves to press in wax paper; one of our favorite past times.

I like it “here.” Something calls me to stay in this place where it seems calm and times are sure. I feel safe back in these simpler days where the good life seems to have more of a grip on me. I’m so tired though! I find myself traveling back and forth between those days and the here and now.

I feel like one of those crisp autumn leaves drifting, drifting and then I am gone for a while. Mary brings me back with my most favorite soup, French onion. When I am done she places one of those special deep red autumn leaves in my hand, so well preserved, pressed with an iron. How could she have known what I was thinking?

I lay back down. La-la-land wisps me away! I don’t want to make any decisions today. It sure sounds like the televisions on…I can’t seem to make a lot of sense of it, yet their gibberish, similar to a foreign language echoes a tunnel affect. I must really have a high fever to make me so nomadic.

Another day comes. The curtains are open, the light is shining in again, and I remember the crisp autumn mornings of yesteryears; the colorful drifting of the red, and yellow leaves... Why is the air on in my room, and why am I wrapped in a quilt? I must have had too much cough syrup. I will make a mental note to cut back.

Who is this looking into my face? I think I know her. She has a scent of familiarity about her. She smiled at me, and said, “Hi sweetheart.” I grinned out of the corner of my mouth. Remembering the crisp autumn days of yesteryear, the colorful leaves drifting in to piles; so picturesque, causes me to put my stakes down. I think I’ll stay here for a while longer.

Remembering crisp autumn mornings of yesterday…red leaves…someone enters my room. I don’t know who it is, but there is a scent... I don’t want to talk to strangers. I’ll just tuck my head under the quilt. The woman smiles at me uncovering my familiar face of 47 years…but I grin not, nor recall her name. Tears can’t be helped on this now one-sided love affair, but lovingly she continues to come to me.

I’ve gone back on that day somewhere in Michigan; there I will stay…but remembering no more the crisp autumn mornings...when the unfamiliar soul and me walked hand in hand together. But in the palm of my hand this guest places a pressed leaf of the deepest red I have ever seen; she is determined to keep those memories alive… if only for her.


Dedicated to those spouses, family members, or care givers of Alzheimer patients. 10/01/09
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This article has been read 626 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Graham Starling
10/08/09
Sadly confusing and effective in putting that across. I would hate to live like this. You might want to check your understanding of effect and affect.
Jan Ackerson
10/09/09
The repetition here is SO effective at making us feel as if we're in the head of an Alzheimer's patient. I'd expect to see this in a higher level.

One or two piddly errors which didn't interfere at all with my appreciation of the excellent writing here.
diana kay
10/09/09
a poignient and sad portrait of dementia . I liked the symbol of the red autumn leaf
Chris Janzen
10/09/09
This was beautiful, heartbreaking, and poignant. Very well done! Excellent story telling.
Joshua Janoski
10/10/09
I was amazed that this piece wasn't in a higher level. This was some amazing writing here.

I agree that the repetition was very effective in conveying this terrible disease.

My only suggestion would be to put the scripture at the end, because it kind of distracted me. It is an excellent addition to the piece, but I just think it would fit better as a conclusion.