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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Twilight Years of Life (07/02/09)
Can You See?
Golden beams retreat below the horizon
Landscape grays and shadows fall,
I lower my eyes to the book in my lap, tiny print on onion skin page.
Who blurred the lines? Who shrunk the print?
Where are my glasses?

I close my eyes seeking respite.

A little girl’s sun-bleached golden locks
Dart and bob in and out of the waves
Emerging at pool’s edge in a fountain of spray,
“Mom, look at me! Did you see me?”

A young woman’s graduation cap askew over dirty-blond tresses
Applause punctuates her valedictory address
She huddles with classmates in groups of adoring parents,
“Hey, did you hear me? Did you like me?”

A tailored suit jacket and skirt beneath tightly permed curls,
Her heels clicking smartly as she strides into the faculty meeting.
Voices hush. Eyes turn to her.
“Thank you for your attention. What do you really think of me?”

A door opens welcoming her home.
Muddy footprints on the couch. Laundry piled high.
Nothing for dinner. Children’s hunger gives way to
Disagreements, anger, disrespect, door slamming.
“Wait, listen to me! Can you hear me?”

My eyes spring open to the twilight.

These children have long since gone to their families
Yet here I sit, reading Your Book
Claiming the last wisps of oranges, pinks and reds,
Dusk settles. Familiar landscape diminishes, distinctions fade.
“Don’t go. I can’t see you!”

The gray of age has overtaken blond tresses,
Wrinkles and bulges have replaced ample elasticity,
Uncertainty has stepped in where authority once reigned,
Shades of gray edging out living color.
“Lord, it’s all I can see. Is this what you see when you see me?”

Father, you are the same, today and forever.
The dusk, the dark, the daylight; all are as light to You.
Your sight is unbounded by the coverings which fade.
You see into my soul.
“Father, do you see yourself there? Do you like what you see?”
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Member Comments
Member
Date
BAYO OMOYIOLA, JR
07/09/09

Great story
Mildred Sheldon
07/10/09
I truly enjoyed Can You See. Life goes on one day at a time until we are called home.
Dee Yoder
07/11/09
Oh, such beautiful imagery and descriptions as this person ages. There is quite a bit of colorful and distinct passages that really bring this picture of the twilight years to life. The last line is wonderful!
Norma-Anne Hough
07/13/09
This poems reads so beautifully. Well done:)
diana kay
07/14/09
good ref;ection some lovely descriptions
Deborah Porter 
07/18/09
Hi Wendy. I just wanted to leave a quick note to let you know your entry, Can You See?, actually did very well in the Twilight Years Challenge. Although you didn't receive an award, you made it into the Highest Rankings for Level 2, placing 7th in that Level.

If you'd like to check the highest rankings for yourself, you can find them here:
http://www.faithwriters.com/Boards/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=26236

The highest rankings are posted every Thursday evening on the Message Boards.

Hope to see you at the FaithWriters' Conference in August. It’s going to be an amazing time of inspiration, information and encouragement. (If I’ve already mentioned that to you, forgive me. We’re just so excited about letting members know about this great gathering.)
http://www.faithwriters.com/conference.php

With love, Deb (Challenge Coordinator)