Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: fathers (06/06/05)
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TITLE: Thinking of You | Previous Challenge Entry
By Benjamin Stephens
06/07/05 -
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“Does it really matter, Little One?” came a counter question.
“I’m just curious.”
“You are that.”
“So…”
“You really want to know?”
“Yes.”
“The one sitting at the table.”
“The one running his hands through his hair?”
“Yes, that’s him.”
“He’s handsome.”
“Why have you been so curious?”
The little one became quiet as he searched for the words, “He didn’t want me to die.”
“That’s true.”
“I just wanted to know what he was like.”
“Right now, he’s having a tough time.”
“Why?”
“Because he’s thinking of you.”
“Me?”
“Yes, you.”
* * * * *
“Abby, it doesn’t have to be this way,” David said as he held her in his arms.
“What choice do we have?” she asked quietly.
“We could get married.”
“Married?”
“Yes! And I could get a job and we could raise this - our - baby.”
“Come on, David! I’ve still got my senior year to go and you’re supposed to be heading to the University this fall. Do you want to just trash our dreams?”
David was quiet for a moment, unsure of what to say.
“I didn’t think so,” Abby said as she walked toward the door.
“Abby, we’ve got to have some choices here.”
“We do, terminate the pregnancy and go on like nothing happened.”
“Terminate the pregnancy? It’s a baby, Abby. Our baby.”
“And neither of us are ready to be parents. Look, David,” Abby stopped and turned his face toward hers, “we made a mistake. I wish it hadn’t happened - you didn‘t want it to happen, but it did and now we’ve got to do something that will give us a future. Having a baby right now will not do that.”
“I hear your words Abby, but I can’t believe them. We’re talking about our baby.”
“We are talking about a blob of tissue, David.” She smiled with a warm assurance that left David confused.
“It’s not a baby - not yet.”
“Blob of tissue? Where did you hear that? At the clinic?”
“Yes, the clinic.”
“I don’t know, Abby. It just seems wrong somehow.”
Abby inhaled deeply and moved toward the door. “Look, David, I’ve gotta go, we’ll talk about this tomorrow. OK?”
“Sure.”
* * * * *
“You did what?” David fought back bile at the words Abby had said. “When?”
“I just got back from the clinic.” Abby seemed less sure of herself today. “It’s over, David. Neither of us have to worry about this again.”
“Why didn’t you let me know?”
“Would you have allowed me to go through with it?”
“No. Yes. I don’t know.”
“Look, I was just as confused as you are, but I can’t think about this right now. It’s done. Sorry you had to hear it this way.”
“Me too,” David said quietly.
“You better go now.”
* * * * *
David sat alone at a corner table in a downtown coffee shop and tried to tell himself that everything would be alright, but he knew otherwise. He knew that he and Abby would never be close again, he knew that he would never be the same and he knew that his child had been murdered. No one told him that this was so, he just knew it. He tried saying that it was just a blob of tissue and that Abby had just terminated a pregnancy, but he knew better.
And he wept.
* * * * *
“He has a son and a daughter now,” he observed
“Yes he does,” the angel said as they watched.
“He seems happy.”
“He is.”
“He’s my dad.”
“I know.”
“He never met me.”
“That’s true.”
“I wonder if he - remembers.”
“Do you recall when you first saw him in the coffee shop?”
“Yes.”
“What was he doing?”
“Running his hands through his hair.”
“What is he doing now?”
“Running his hands through his hair.”
“Yes, but he is doing something even more important.”
“He is?”
“He’s doing something special, something he has done every day since you came to stay with us.”
“Really?”
“He’s thinking of you.”
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Excellent, heart-felt writing. Simply beautiful.
Blessings, Lynda