The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
04/17/08
This is sweet--how nice to learn that you were writing about your dad!

This could be expanded by working on "showing, not telling" or by choosing just one incident to highlight your special relationship.
04/17/08
Ohhh, I bet you were very close to your dad! Daddy's little girl got all the birthday cake and presents, and he didn't mind.
04/22/08
What a close and special bond you had/have with your father. Show us one of your times together, so wee can see it and experience it too. You are so blesed.
04/22/08
Very good. When you say he was filled with emotion, you might want to show it instead, like saying, "He dropped his head in his hands and wept." You write so nice!!