The Official Writing Challenge
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Wonderful account of the awakening of a soul to the depth of living for(not just talking about) God.
03/01/08
This reads like poetry in prose. Wonderfully descriptive and vivid.
03/02/08
A wonderful description of the Spirit moving in one person's soul.
03/02/08
A beautifully written piece. Watch your use of commas and exclamation points. Keep writing.
03/02/08
I thought this very therapeutic for the writer him/or herself; but for a Reader, they may have gone away empty ...so to speak. (I might be called the Simon Cowell of the Writers Group but I like to be honest - as I hope other Writers are with my work; however, it IS well written. Thanks for sharing.
You have some good descriptions here, but not much of a plot. Perhaps this should be shortened and made into a poem? A lot of poetry is more emotion-driven than story-driven.