Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Police (10/12/06)
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TITLE: Don't Quote Me | Previous Challenge Entry
By Chad Lower
10/17/06 -
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This was not my first run-in with the police. I remember a few years earlier, fourth grade, I believe, when I felt the urge to go. I raised my hand like I was taught and waited for the teacher to call on me.
“Can I go to the bathroom?” I asked.
“I don't know, can you?” was the reply back.
My tiny mind was so confused. If I knew I could go, I wouldn't have asked—I would have stood up and left. This time, the Grammar Police informed me that can means “am I able to” whereas may means “to seek permission.” When I asked “Can I go to the bathroom?” I was really asking if I was physically able. Certainly a silly question as I had been going for almost a decade, so of course I can. What I should have asked was, “May I go to the bathroom?” Again, I am indebted to the Grammar Police.
A lot is two words, not one. Mom should be capitalized when referring to a person's name, but not when referring to an identity. Never end a sentence with a preposition. A double negative works in math, but not in English class. Unfortunately, not everyone has had a run in with the Grammar Police. For example, I have seen a lot of ignorant people misuse the word ignorant (it means not knowing).
But of all the police I've seen over the years, there is one that I have never seen, yet I believe its existence would be beneficial. As it doesn't exist, it doesn't have a formal name, but I have unofficially dubbed it the Bible Police. Too often in my travels, I hear Bible verses misquoted. I wish the Bible Police would show up and correct these errors from (often times) well meaning Christians.
One misquote I hear most often usually is said to someone after they have experienced a great tragedy. One of their Christian friends will reach out to them in love and say, “Remember, God causes everything for the good of those who love Him.” NO! Your tragedy is not good. Innocent children dying everyday is not good. Famine, disease, and pestilence are not good. The real verse is Romans 8:28, “God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love [Him]…” People forget the together part. Your tragedy is not good, but maybe through that tragedy, someone gets to know Christ. Or maybe someone can be a blessing to you during that trial. These are the “together” that make the tragedy “good.”
Another misstated Bible verse is, “Thou shall not judge.” First, none of the Ten Commandments refer to judging others. Probably the verse they mean to quote is Matthew 7:1, “Do not judge others, and you will not be judged.” But don't forget the context. We later read (I Corinthians 5:12-13), “It isn’t my responsibility to judge outsiders, but it certainly is your responsibility to judge those inside the church who are sinning. God will judge those on the outside; but as the Scriptures say, 'You must remove the evil person from among you.'” (That last reference is to Deuteronomy 17:7.) Then a few sentences later (I Corinthians 6:2, 3), “Don’t you realize that someday we believers will judge the world? Don’t you realize that we will judge angels?” So it's not that we aren't allowed to judge, but we need to be careful of the manner and the context we judge in.
Uh oh—I just ended that last sentence with a preposition. I can hear the Grammar Police coming now.
All verses from the NLT.
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