The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 685 times
Member Comments
I didn't quite get this. The flow seemed a bit out of kilter for me. Maybe if you could have used more words, then the flow would have been smoother for me.

I do like the idea of the centurion guard being converted.
Interesting writing, well done. My only suggestion is to perhaps try to cover less ground in more depth. This story does seem to be spread a little thin, as you include three days within the 750 word limit. If you make this part of a longer work, I suspect you would flesh out your story to everyone's satisfaction.

Keep putting that talent to work!