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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Soul (07/13/06)
The dew on the dawn's early grass glistened brightly as I drew my curtains back, sipping my morning coffee. The promise of a new day, new opportunities. As I gazed through the window pane I saw a beautiful cardinal land in the branches of my favorite willow tree, chirping away. After I finished my coffee, I decided to take my morning walk and talk with the Lord in the nearby orchards near my home. I had been pondering my current troubles, pouring out my heart to the One who knows me best. Nature had always nurtured me as part of God's creation and this is where I felt His presence. All of a sudden out of the woods bounded a deer with it's cotton tail flouncing behind. Then another followed in pursuit. I gazed in amazement. Then I averted my gaze back to the road that led to my house. Were my eyes playing tricks on me or what? Was it a branch on a tree or was it an animal? I whistled to gain it's attention. It's little head turned around and stared at me...it was a fox! As I drew nearer to this auburn-colored creature, it fled deeper into the trees as a caught a glimpse of it's long body and fluffy tail. As I continued my way through the orchards, I saw one of those ugly sticker bushes, but low and behold on the top of this awful bunch of stickers were two beautiful white flowers.
I approached this mess of stickers and gazed inside the beautiful white blossums. What engaged my senses was the royal purple center with rich yellow gold in the very center. What I imagined was this was God's picture of my soul--in the midst of a "stickery" world, God's purity is shining through, reminding me of my position of royalty symbolized by the purple priestly robe and crowning me with His kingly crown. I drew strength from these visible earthly reminders that He indeed is the Restorer of my soul.
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Member Comments
Member
Date
Deborah Bauers
07/22/06
This piece is a good reminder of how God's creation can refresh us. Remember to proof your work carefully. You have a few grammatical changes that should be made. Sometimes it works well to reduce the size of run-on sentences, making each thought more concise. I loved your last sentence-great closing!
william price
07/23/06
Forgetting all the mechanics here for a minute. They will come as you hone your craft, but you have the hard part already. I found your entry to be an honest very visual snippet of life. That special, brief, unplanned moment where God shows us something. And you communicated that well with the imagery of yor words. You ministered your point. Well done. You are on your way. God Bless you!!
Marilyn Schnepp 
07/27/06
Short, brief and to the point! Very well done with the exception of a couple of minor words missing; and I'd like to suggest you space out your one large paragraph into some smaller ones to make it much easier to read. I loved the nature walk and the thoughts you arrived at on that walk. Nicely done.