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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Inner Strength (04/20/06)
My eyes are open for one more day
Fear strikes and grips my heart
What will happen to me this day?

    I awake for this new day
    The Lord is near as He has promised, forever and for always
    What is it You have for me this day?

Off to work, that dreary place
Where people chat and gossip
Where no work is accomplished
At such a blazing pace

    Lord, You know me best of all
    And placed me where I can serve You as You call
    To soothe the hearts of those in sorrow
    To bring blessing upon tomorrow

Doing time for but a pittance
Don’t I deserve a little more?
My boss is cheap and shows no patience
As I slave away to do his chore

    The work I do, I do for You
    As to God and not to man
    For if I don’t You’ll see right through me
    At this day’s end, I will to stand

Home again and oh so lonely
No one here to share my grief
I close my eyes to sleep
Only to wake the demons deep inside
Fear strikes and grips my heart
No one here, my soul to keep

    Now I lay me down to sleep
    I pray the Lord, my soul to keep
    If I should die before I wake
    I pray the Lord my soul to take*

    (*Final verse an 18th century children's prayer)
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Member Comments
Member
Date
Steve Uppendahl
04/28/06
Nicely done. The narrator's tone comes through well.

I really liked the second to last stanza. Beautifully stated and packs a punch. I could even see that one stanza leading to a story. Think about it.

Good work.
Carol Shaffron
05/02/06
Hhhmmnn, me thinks you've been reading my thoughts! But then how could you? Very imaginative and creative description of the existence of many of God's children!

And great encouragement on how to "be a living sacrifice" and do it as unto the Lord! May God bless you with HIS abundant grace in your coming in and in your going out and in the midst of the "valley". Makes me think of both Joseph and David and how their faithfulness in serving in the little things, "taught" them to be mighty and powerful rulers God could trust with much more ...Occupy til I come. Advance O Mighty One in the making!!!
Jan Ackerson
05/03/06
This poem communicates very effectively the things that many of us deal with day after day.

It would be even more effective to take the rhythm and rhyme scheme of the "Now I lay me..." poem and use them in the rest of the poem. A few minor adjustments could accomplish that.

Good job!