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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: CHALLENGE (08/17/17)
Clarissa lay on her stomach looking out a tiny window. She couldn’t move. She glanced behind her at the 15 feet she had traveled to get to the end of the crawl space. It wasn’t a crawl space. It wasn’t big enough to crawl in. If she lifted her head, it would hit the ceiling. How long would they keep her here? An invisible hand began to squeeze her stomach. Menacing fingers of fire invaded her chest. She began to breathe in shallow, frantic breaths.



“I can’t stand this!” her mind screamed. “Please, just kill me!”



Her eyes flew open. She sucked in gulps of air. She stretched her arms upward, relishing the freedom of space. She kicked off the covers and lay staring at the ceiling in the green glow of the clock. 2:38 a.m.



What was happening to her? She was not a fearful person. Was this menopause? Could hormones wreak this much havoc?



Carefully she rolled herself out of bed, glancing at her husband, Greg, to see if she had disturbed his sleep. His soft purr, as she liked to call it, could still be heard.



In the kitchen, she popped in a coffee pod. Eternity defined itself in the three minutes it took to fill the cup.



“Lord,” she prayed, “are you giving me these feelings because I need to help someone with anxiety issues? Or is this just how my life is going to play out? Are you trying to help me banish the fear of dying by making it seem preferable to living?”



Settling into a recliner, she contemplated the embers of panic still glowing inside. It wouldn’t take much to fan them to life.



“Just breathe, Clarissa. It’s all in your head. You can control it.”



But could she? Was this a trial of her mind or her body? A chemical imbalance perhaps?



Cradling her coffee mug on her stomach, she leaned her head back and searched for clues in the pea soup of her mind. An episode of Newhart floated to the top like a dingy piece of ham.



“Doctor, I’m afraid of being buried alive in a box,” the patient had said.



Bob Newhart responds with wise counsel, “Just stop it.”



She repeats this to herself, “Just STOP IT.” It can’t hurt to try.



Scraps of tv shows, online articles, and sermons mingled together to become her mental therapist.



“Are you worried about something? Is this your mind’s way of telling you that you need to make some changes? Are you overwhelmed? Is this the result of sin? What are you afraid of?”



Fear. It was fear. But fear of what?



She imagined her mental therapist, pen in hand, waiting for the revelation.



“Getting old. Being in pain.”



OK, this was a start.



“Not being able to breathe.” Ah. Now we’re getting somewhere.



Clarissa saw images of her mother and father, struggling to breathe. Both suffering and dying because of lung disease.



“Go on,” her mind urged her.



“Well, I’m afraid I’ll be imprisoned and put in a hole where I can’t stand or stretch out.” Her admission stoked the embers.



This was crazy. She was nuts. She could feel the proverbial cheese sliding off her cracker.



People always envied her sunny personality, often becoming annoyed by her positive outlook. A hint of bitterness creeped in as she thought about how her optimism had betrayed her. A cheerful heart was supposed to be good medicine. Obviously, she needed a new prescription.



Taking another sip of coffee, Clarissa prayed. “Father, what do you prescribe?”



Wisps of scripture began to rise like the steam from her coffee.



Trust in the Lord . . . lean not on your own understanding . . . cast all your cares on Him . . . He has not given us a spirit of fear . . .



She settled back in her chair, anticipating the promised peace and hope. Nothing. Just pulsing embers threatening to ignite.



“What the heck, Lord??”



“Trust Me.”



“Dadgumit, God! I AM trusting you. Trusting you to get rid of this anxiety.”



“Trust Me. Moment by moment.”



“I don’t want a journey like this.”



“I’m giving you a journey like this.”



She took a slow, deep breath. The embers died down a little. Could she trust Him? She knew she could. She knew she had to.



Hesitantly, fearfully, she placed her hand in His. A tiny trickle of peace made its way toward the smoldering coals.



“OK, Lord. Challenge accepted.”
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This article has been read 987 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Lynda Schultz 
08/24/17
Enjoyed the progression of this journey. Well done. I THINK "crept" would be better than "creeped." Good job.
Larry Whittington
08/25/17
Nice writing.

The Jews of the Old Testament were constantly told to trust God. Trusting God is the same as obeying Him because if we don't trust Him we won't be doing what we are told to do.

Today we can believe Jesus but if we don't trust Jesus we won't be doing what Jesus (God) tells (commands) us to do.

Obeying all that Jesus commands shows us, or is proof to us, that we trust Him because we believe Him.

We take God's hand and ask Him to show us how we need to grow.

Keep up you good writing.
Elaine Hemingway
08/25/17
Well done - could feel the journey and recognise that old dangerous request for patience as we wait for needs to be met. Keep hold of His hand! Every blessing.
C D Swanson 
08/25/17
Well done, on topic and powerful message.
Blessings~
Bonnie Bowden 
08/26/17
The beginning had a good hook to draw the reader in. Fear can be a powerful enemy.

I would rethink using the word, "Dadgumit." Some readers might be offended by it.
Jay Dalton
08/28/17
You have done well...Keep writing.
Phillip Cimei
08/28/17
A wonderful job of hitting the topic.
You had a good hook and kept me reading.

It flowed well and had a good ending to it.

You were able to express your inner fears on paper. That is great.

I enjoyed this very much and feel you will do well on the judging.

You need to keep writing more wonderful stories.

God bless.
Jody Day
08/31/17
This is VERY WELL done! I literally couldn't breathe with the character in the beginning. Keep writing!
Bonnie Bowden 
08/31/17
Congratulations on your 2nd place finish in the Beginners category, Windy.

Very descriptive writing; I got anxious just reading.
Loni Bowden-Horn 
08/31/17
Windy,

Congratulations on your second place in the beginner category

This was a suspenseful entry and you opened with a great beginning

Thank you for all the twists and turns in the plot.

Well Written