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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: STIR (11/12/15)
Your Walk Impacts Others

Amber and Cassie are best friends. They have known each other for many years and now attend the same high school. Cassie grew up in a Christian home with her parents and younger siblings. Amber grew up as a single child without her father and recently relocated back to her hometown with her mother. As young children, the two were once inseparable. They were both very excited to be back together finally after all those years. Although, they both knew each other as young children, time apart proved a lack of real knowledge and showed personality and relational differences in their spiritual beliefs, principles, and values.
The two girls had several classes together one semester, which gave them an opportunity to work on a science project together. Alexa was a girl whom Amber did not really know but from what she knew of Alexa, she disliked her. She saw her as a phony and a bully. Amber witnessed an incident where Alexa had lied on Cassie, so she told Cassie. Cassie tried to let it go, but Amber confronted Alexa in the bathroom, in Cassie’s presence. Cassie looked at Alexa and said, “Please do not spread lies on me anymore.” Then Cassie returned to the classroom.
“Cassie, I don’t believe you just let her off that easily. Why didn't you do something, we had her in the bathroom? You should have told her off,” said Amber. “Amber you know I am a Christian, I can’t do that. You don’t seem to understand what it means to be a disciple of Jesus Christ,” Cassie exclaimed. “What do you mean by that Cassie? I am a Christian too, I am not going to allow people to keep taking advantage of me, the way you do. Besides, Jesus does not expect us to go around letting people lie on us. We are to stand up for ourselves and walk in boldness. Sometimes we have to fight for what is right. Otherwise, people will just walk all over us.” Amber shouted.
“Shush, Amber you don’t understand living for Jesus is not that simple. Jesus expects us to turn the other cheek. He wants us to forgive those who hurt us. We may not like what they do to us, but we must forgive them and do them no harm. Don’t you think I am sick and tired of her meanness towards me? The way she manipulates me whenever she wants something, the deception, and the lies. I once thought of her as a close friend but, as I got to know her I learned how she really is and I have to accept her as she is. She does not think I know some of the stuff she has done to me and others, but I know everything. My hands are tied Amber. I have to treat her nice and show her love even though I don’t want to. I do not have any choice anymore. My flesh wants to pull her fake weave out. If I allow my imagination to run free, I could tell you exactly what I would do to her. Now enough about her Amber let’s get back to work we’ve got to finish this project” said Cassie.
Amber shook her head then reached for the scissors pointing them at Cassie. “Cassie, I think you are taking this religious thing with Jesus a little bit too far. It is time for you to stand up to her and put your foot where the sun does not shine.” “AMBER! What are you saying? How can you talk that way? Look, do you know how hard this is for me? You know what the bible says. I am trying to do what is right and by the way, Amber. You may have a religion, but I have a relationship with Jesus Christ. I talk to Him the same way I talk to you. If I am going to be one of His followers then I must see people the way He does. I must forgive and walk in love, no matter how much it hurts.”
Amber began cutting the pieces, looked at Cassie and said, “I think you’re scared of Alexa Cassie.” Cassie replied, “No, Amber you’re trying to stir up trouble where there is none anymore. I have learned to pray and let Jesus fight my battles. He knows everything. You should really try Him Amber.”









Word Count 750/ Challenge Word (Stir)



Writers note: When we decide to accept Jesus Christ and we choose to follow Him we may want to do things contrary to that of His teachings but the Spirit that dwells within us will not allow it. It is in those moments throughout life’s journey that we are tested. We can choose to follow our flesh or fulfill/walk in the fruit of the spirit, which we can find in the book of Galatians chapter 5. Walking not after the flesh and the desires therein is a conscious choice. We must make the choice to walk in the spirit when we can consciously do that we are free to follow Jesus totally.
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This article has been read 474 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Donna Powers
11/19/15
This is a nice story and a good way to show your theme. I believe your story should use some spaces between sentences, in order to improve the ease of reading it.
Larry Whittington
11/22/15
Separate each girls conversation words in their own paragraph.

Good thoughts.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 
11/25/15
I enjoyed your story. You did a nice job of demonstrating what stirring things up means. You grabbed my attention with a clear conflict. It's one many of us could relate to.

You had some POV shifts. It's a hard concept to fully understand, but basically the reader sees things through the MC's eyes. You showed from both girls' POV. Instead, I'd encourage you to pick Amber and show what she sees, hears, and thinks. You don't need to tell the reader the back story in the initial paragraph. Instead sprinkle it throughout the story and plunge right into the conflict. For example: Amber ducked into the bathroom and took a deep breath, slowly counting to ten.
Cassie stormed in behind her. "We've been friends forever, and I think you should stand up to Alexa."
By using body language, thoughts and dialog, you can show the reader instead of tell them.

Your message is a great one.. It's a clear one that I can tell you feel quite passionate about. The Holy Spirit will use your story for sure. In fact, you did such a good job of expressing your message that you didn't need that paragraph at the end. Your reader will know that from the dialog and the story itself. You did a nice job of using the topic in a different way. It will definitely make the reader stop and think, and that's a good thing. I look forward to reading more of your work. I suspect as you read and write more, you will grow quite quickly. Nice job.