Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Cat and Dog (09/04/14)
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TITLE: Crazy Lifesaving Critters | Previous Challenge Entry
By Melissa Lindsey
09/11/14 -
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Autumn was in the air and Ray marveled at the landscape of gold, red and green spread before him. With an upward glance, Ray gave thanks for the reminders of God's grace all around him.
God's grace was the only explanation for his very existence today. Ray knew this with every ounce of his being. He looked down at the nub of a thumb and the pinky finger remaining on his left hand and thanked God for the crab-claw looking device. "Imagine how much harder life would be if I were missing either of them," Ray thought to himself.
It was hard to believe it had been almost two years since the life altering event.
On an Autumn day, much like today. The trees were beginning to take on hues of red and gold, but the condition of Ray's mind on that day was dark and ugly. He had recently learned that Tessa, his wife of seven years, had been unfaithful.
Ray learned of Tessa's deception via a text message on her cell phone. He wasn't snooping. In fact, he had had no suspicions whatsoever until he read the conversation between Tessa and her lover. Her lover Robert, Ray's only brother.
As Ray had scrolled through their texts, the pieces had started coming together. Late meetings, early appointments…
The more Ray read, the angrier he became. A fire began in his belly and pushed its way upward burning him from the inside out. It became a monster of its own, a living breathing thing that hurled him along pushing him to do everything but the right thing. He couldn't talk to Tessa. He couldn't talk to Robert. He could only burn in anguish, knowing right from wrong, but plotting the unthinkable in spite of it.
Robert always fed the horses at 8:00 each evening. On this particular evening, Gus, the old basset hound and Tabby the resident mouse catcher lay together by the old barn door, for once giving up their shenanigans and finding peace with one another. Robert chuckled at the sight of them in spite of the heaviness in his heart.
Guilt had hit him in the chest like a ton of bricks. He had never intended the affair with Tessa and he had ended it. He was repulsed by himself and shamed by his actions. He could not believe that he had done something so vile…especially to his own brother.
He had been attracted to Tessa from the moment that he first laid eyes on her and when she sought him out his ego had taken hold of him without release. Sure, he had resisted for a while, but she was relentless.
Robert scooped feed into the horse's trough as his mind ran circles looking for a way to right his wrongs. Confession seemed to be the right thing to do, but could they ever truly build a bond of trust again if Ray knew the truth?
Robert heard the rustling of straw in the back of the barn and turned quickly toward the sound. Looking straight into the barrel of Ray's 45, Robert had no doubt that the decision for disclosure had been removed from him. Ray knew the truth.
"I'm…sorry", began Robert.
"Save it", yelled Ray. "This is what is going to happen. You are going to die and then I am going to die. It's like the story of Cane and Able, but neither of us will be returning home."
Suddenly, with a growl and a hiss, Gus and Tabby were at it again. Gus chased Tabby right into Ray where she promptly clawed her way up his pants leg.
"Aghhhh!", yelled Ray as he fended off the crazy cat, completely forgetting about the loaded gun. As both his hands came together, the gun fired.
Intense pain exploded in Ray's left hand and his mind grew fuzzy. Ray turned his head to the side and saw Gus and Tabby peering at him from behind a hay bale. He was losing consciousness, but he would swear those crazy critters were smiling at him.
I still have plans for you my son. Forgiveness is possible through me.
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Well done!
God bless~
Many lessons in this. One sin does not live by itself.
Even "little sins" will have to be followed by others.
Good work.
I especially liked the part that read "Looking straight into the barrel of Ray's 45, Robert had no doubt that the decision for disclosure had been removed from him."
I also liked the way the ending sort of trailed off, and came full circle to the beginning. It makes me want to know what happened next. Did the brothers reconcile? I could see this as a novel... :)
God bless~