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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Great Expectations (not about the book) (08/25/11)
Ben reached over to strangle the alarm clock just before it could jangle its repetitive reminder to “rise and shine”, he had been awake for quite some time in anticipation of the promise he had made to his children, twelve year old Cynthia and eight year old Arnold, that today was to be their collective “catchup” day. A day set aside as a special family treat to combat the recent incessant busy lifestyle that had impacted dramatically on the family’s lifestyle.

The expectation of a day on the lake in their boat chasing the elusive Rainbow Trout was a treat for the whole family and hopes were high as Ben and his wife Doreen had unstilled in their children a love of the great outdoors and appreciation of God’s wonderful creation. Not forgetting that both children were equal first with the number of fish caught, a situation that Ben was determined to correct.

Descending the stairs to the kitchen he could hear the excited voices of his children and the sounds of Doreen preparing breakfast and the picnic hamper that would naturally be complimented with the catch of the day. He should have known that in these circumstances alarm clocks were deemed to be redundant.

The excitement was infectious as the family were on their way jubilantly claiming bragging rights even before wetting a line.

The short journey to the lake soon had the boat launched with the three combatants poised for action just before the sun came up, “the best time of day to fish”.

The lake was covered in a mystic fog and feeding birds could be seen darting in and out of the mist in their search for insects that provided food for both birds and rising fish. It was the sound of these fish as they broke the surface that prompted Doreen to fish from the shore as she was a proficient fly fisher and had on several occasions outfished the rest of the family.

The first couple of hours were cool, although idyllic, but unfruitful, so it was decided to head for shore to enjoy a warming camp fire and hot drinks for all and to discuss tactics.

These were the special moments that the whole family savoured when they experienced God’s presence as their spirits became receptive to His desire to be part of all aspects of their lives. Both Ben and Doreen had come to this lake for many years and this was the very spot where God had clearly influenced them with the words of the Psalmist.... “Be still and know that I am God”......

The rest of the day proved to be a great family day but the fish had remained elusive, just as well Doreen had a backup plan for lunch.

On their way home from the lake a traditional evening meal of giant pancakes and hot chocolate were needed to reflect on the day with the usual advice from Ronnie the best pancake cook this side of the mountains, congratulating the children that they were still the family champions.

As was the family custom every evening Ben and Doreen prayed with their children before they went to bed, however, this had not been possible for quite some time due to Ben’s work commitments so this made the day even more special as they had all missed these moments.

They were seated around their dining table and as Ben started to pray he felt the small hands of Cynthia and Arnold squeezing and squirming themselves into his own. Ben opened his eyes and as both his children had their eyes firmly shut he was acutely aware of the spontaneity of this precious moment. He felt the warmth and love of his children and was silently meditating on the joy of the moment when the silence was broken by Cynthia as she prayed, surging his heart towards bursting point.

“Dear Jesus” she began, “thank You for Mummy, Daddy and Arnold and the nice day we had today even though we didn’t catch any fish”.

Ben’s heart melted as he wrapped his arms around his family.

The day had confirmed that regardless of what our hopes and expectations are, God will always reveal Himself in a very special way as we remain responsive to His desire to be part of our daily lives.
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Member Comments
Member
Date
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 
09/01/11
This is such a sweet story. I loved the family values and the knowledge that in today's hectic life, many families could use a catch-up day.

There were several places where you needed commas, semi-colons, hyphens and ellipses .... should only have three dots. You also used unstill instead of instill.

With some brushing up on the mechanics of writing you have great potential. (Thereare some awesome threads on the message boards such as Jan's Writing Basics and Ann's Grammar.) Keep writing you have great stories with good messages in them!
C D Swanson 
09/03/11
"God will always reveal Himself in a very special way as we remain responsive to His desire to be part of our daily lives"...I loved this part.

Nice story overall, good message throughout. Keep writing for the Lord in exaltation of His glory. God Bless~