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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Winter (the season) (08/13/09)
Winter the season with the shortest days of all season
But sure holds the sweetest joy of all
Nature has made you special among the seasons.
Like God choose the little things to give joy
So you give joy to all.
Like God himself decides to come from the smallest tribe
Of the 12 tribes so has he ordain happiness to come out of the shortest
days that you have.
Winter the season with the shortest nights among the seasons
So is with suffering and pains that will end soon because the nights are short
HO! Winter the season, how we long for you because the days has been to long and
Hot now you come to wet trees and all.
We are dry and we need a refreshing and now you come
Tell the snowshoe hare not to worry because the winter comes
There is a change of color
Tell xmass tree that there is refreshing
Tell the house hold of faith that faith writers are writing about
the season because the savior was born in the season
Tell those who needs forgiveness of sin that winter comes with snow
“thy soul shall be made white as the snow.”
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Member Comments
Member
Date
Patricia Turner 
08/20/09
Some insightful observations here - like the smallest tribe of Israel and the shortest days. Keep an eye on your tenses (use chose instead of choose in this context for instance).
Dan Blankenship
08/25/09
Really good on substance and character...only a few minor mistakes with grammar, such as: "Like God choose" should be “chose”.

But these minor mistakes did not take away from your interesting perspective! Really enjoyed this!

Thanks for sharing.

May God bless and always keep you writing!

Sincerely,
Dan Blankenship
Lisa Johnson
08/27/09
Like the others, I enjoyed the interesting take on the winter season. There were a few grammatical errors, but they did not take away from my interest.