The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
10/19/07
The "story within a story" format is a creative choice.

It seems to me that the story the youth pastor told was kind of young for a teen audience. A similar story about a teen standing up to bullies might have been more effective.

The object lesson was certainly valid, and a valuable one for teens. Thanks!
10/22/07
I like your analogy of a "normal" situation - could definitely be related to. Nice job.
10/22/07
Many teens have gone through similar situations and this is a good way to illustrate the importance of backing up your friends. I didn't quite get the transition at the beginning, but it was a nice story and a good lesson.