The Official Writing Challenge
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Sorry such bad memories emerge from such a wonderful thing as sewing. But, sometimes, parents (usually fathers) get caught up in commerce only to wish later they had taken more time with the important things.
03/07/07
You told this story well. I could feel the emotions. Childhood lost is never regained. I think though that there is healing in the telling and the message is one that needs to be heard. Good job.
03/08/07
My first comment is this was one very solid piece of writing, so solid I don't see you in this category for long. Secondly you brought an important message to the forefront of my mind, the memories vividly expressed. I could just picture the building and all the work going on while a family scattered. The line about dismantling the family was amazing. Very well done, I'm just sorry it had to come from a personal experience.
This was wonderfully told with well-chosen words and phrases.

Your writing seems to reflect a artist's pereception of life - it can be balm for the soul.
03/08/07
Yes - a tale that needs to be told. And it seems the oldest ends up with the deepest wounds to heal. Poignant for this generation. Hopefully others will read this as an incentive to make those important decisions that are best for the WHOLE family. Excellent job of writing!

03/08/07
This is very well written. Your detailed descriptions make it so easy to "see" the story. This sounds very much like a healing piece -- I hope it really helped you.
Great descriptions - especially the paragraph where she first entered the factory. I stumbled a couple of times on your wording at the beginning, but once I picked up your rhythm, this piece really flowed. Thank you for sharing your difficult childhood with us.
God bless.
03/08/07
You should definitely give your "inner child" lots of hugs because the poor little girl needs them. What a touching story. My heart went out to her. This is well written. Thanks for sharing it.
03/08/07
Wow - this is VERY powerful! Your description and atmosphere and characterization wer wonderful. The imagery was right on, too. You won't be in beginners long, dear friend!
03/08/07
Fantastic! Speaks a much larger message to our generation. Well done!
Your descriptions of sounds, sights and smells are vivid. This is such a different and well-written take on the subject. Congratulations on your success.
03/12/07
Hi Angela. I judged for this topic and loved your story. On my tally sheet, it placed 2nd out of all the entries across all levels. I hope to see you in the Editors Choice soon. Keep writing!