The Official Writing Challenge
BACK TO
CHALLENGE
MAIN
INSTRUCTIONS
how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level
ENTRIES
submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners
Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.


TRUST JESUS TODAY

  • Share
  • how it works
  • Submit
Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Abundance (06/08/06)
HENRY, THE SNAIL


“Oh! Ah! Ow! Ouch! Hot! Hot!” thought Henry. “This sidewalk is almost too hot to cross. I knew I should have crossed earlier this morning when it was cooler, but those big new luscious plant leaves in the flower bed were too good to leave.”

“Those leaves were good, but now I want something better. I’ve always dreamed of getting into the garden, but I know I can’t do it myself. It’s so far away. I would love to dine on juicy squash leaves, or pole bean leaves, or maybe even some mint to freshen my breath. There has to be something better than just the foliage plants around this common, ordinary yard. Maybe if I try harder, I can make it into the garden this time.”

Looking up and admiring the fluttering butterflies, Henry thought, “Sure wish I had those big wings that the butterflies have. Then I could just sail through the air right across this old hot sidewalk into that beautiful garden over there.”

As Henry plodded along, he heaved a sigh and thought, “You have to have a lot of patience to be a snail, ’cause you can’t get anywhere very fast. Compared to me, Elmer, the tortoise, is fast, and he is the slowest thing in the whole yard.”

“Uh oh! Why is it getting dark all of a sudden? Oh no! It’s the shadow of the gardener. He’s coming. I’ve gotta hurry. He’ll probably squash me just like all those other big people who love to squash anything that crawls. It’s not safe around this yard. If I could just get under those big leaves next to the sidewalk, he won’t be able to see me. Then maybe I can sneak into his garden.”

“What? What is he doing? Why, he is picking me up and putting me right in the middle of his garden on a big juicy looking leaf. I don’t understand. Why is he being so good to me? All I ever do is destroy his good work, his plants. How could he care about me? I’m just a creepy, crawly worm. Why is he giving me what I always dreamed of, a place in his garden?”

“This is outstanding. I won’t ever have to leave, because I have everything I ever wanted right here in the garden. It’s better than I ever imagined. Thank you…”

“…, put your hope in the LORD; For with the LORD there is mercy, and with Him is abundant redemption.” Psalm 130:7 (NKJV)
The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be right now. CLICK HERE

JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.
This article has been read 865 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Sharlyn Guthrie
06/15/06
This story is adorable, and right to the point! I would love to see an illustrated children's book version!
Virginia Gorg
06/16/06
I second the children's book idea. Nicely done and quite descriptive.
Marty Wellington 
06/18/06
Excellent story. I thoroughly enjoyed the comparisons to God and the gardener. Wonderful images. Nicely done!
Amy Nicholson
06/19/06
COOL! Nice concept. Good job.
Yvette Nietzen
06/21/06
Great story. I agree with everyone else, this would make a great children's book. I like the part about the plants, more like a science book with colorful pictures.
Helen Paynter
06/21/06
Lovely piece - one of favourites htis week.
Valerie Routhieaux
06/21/06
Very good. I could see that little snail trying to cross the hot sidwalk. And your description of the gardner, was a very good description of our loving Heavenly Father as the Gardner. Would like to see this illustrated for children. Delightful. Keep writing.
Trina Courtenay
06/22/06
Kaylee, I agree with the others about the children's book.

One little thing...in the 3rd last para. did you mean to say he was a creepy, crawly worm? I thought Henry was a snail?

Anyhow, I loved this story.

Blessings,
Trina
Trina Courtenay
06/22/06
Hey, Henry the snail got highly commended...way to go. P.S. Last night I went to post another comment to your delightful story but I kept losing my connection with the internet. Anyway, your lady bug pledge was great and very creative.

Trina<><
Sherril Wendling
06/22/06
Congratulations! This is just adorable! I like this:
"maybe even some mint to freshen my breath." Very cleverly done; I hope you can get published for children soon!