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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Abundance (06/08/06)
Having It All


Things, things, and more things, a superabundance of items obtained in the marketplace—I just can’t seem to get enough.
Last week, my very generous husband bought me a new laptop computer. It would seem that such an extravagant gift would satisfy anyone’s appetite for material possessions. Somehow, however, getting the computer just fueled my desire for more. I couldn’t have a laptop without also getting my own carrying bag, I reasoned, so I ordered myself a nice one with leather trim. Within the past two weeks, in addition to the laptop, I’ve bought several items that were not exactly necessary, including a diamond ring.
I only paid fifty dollars at a pawn shop for the ring, and I was assured by a jeweler that I had gotten a great deal. I love a bargain and seldom pay retail for anything. Somehow, getting a really good deal helps me justify my materialistic urges.
It’s like a game, seeing how much stuff I can get with the limited amount of money I have. My eye is always roving, looking for the next deal. Fortunately, I don’t have unlimited access to cash. I shudder to think of what my spiritual condition would be, if I could buy anything I wanted.
As much as I hate to admit it, I am a thingaholic. My passion for more stuff is never-ending. I realize that my addiction to shopping is a means of escape, just one of the many ways a person can avoid facing reality. I’ve tried various others. At one time, alcohol was an escape for me, and I drank too much. Before that, food used to be an escape, and I overate.
My heart and mind are restless, pacing back and forth inside me like a tiger in a cage. I’m a Christian, so it goes without saying that this sorry state of affairs results in a conflict. In his gospel, Luke writes, “Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; a man’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.” (Luke 12:15, NIV) Likewise, the Bible clearly instructs Christians to be in the world, but not of it. In spite of this admonition, however, I frequently find myself searching for my identity in the things of earth.
Not to whine, but it’s hard, living with myself in the here and now. It’s really pretty painful. When push comes to shove, the truth is that I like to get away from myself. And no wonder. When I’m honest, I’ve got to admit that there plenty of things about myself that I don’t like. When I come eyeball to eyeball with the person I really am, sometimes I’m kind of ashamed.
There are, however, times when I stop running from myself long enough to let the Lord still and quiet my soul. At such times, I taste the nectar of God’s peace. Even when I’m not capable of reaching for Jesus, he reaches for me. He reminds me through the Holy Spirit that he loves me more than I can ever know. When God looks at me, he sees with eyes of compassion, not disgust. He sees my materialism and greed, and he knows how I use them to hide from myself. Even so, he assures me that I am his beloved daughter. Nothing I can ever do—or not do—will change that.
God knows that I’m not Wonder Woman. The truth is, I don’t really want to be powerful. I just want to be loved. No one else can fill the gaping maw of my need for unconditional love the way God does. I don’t have to do anything special to be significant to him. I’m important to God just because he made me and he loves me. There was no mistake. God created me just the way he wanted me to be, and I’m an original in which he delights.
So here I sit at my new laptop computer, typing away about God’s love. I smile at the irony. Only God could find a way to use my sinful lust for material things to help me acquire this computer, an item that might turn out to be truly useful. Only God can salvage something good, even out of the junk heap of my faults. Now that’s mercy. That’s having your cake and eating it, too. That’s abundance.
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Member Comments
Member
Date
Amy Nicholson
06/19/06
I appreciate the honesty here. I liked the "tiger in the cage" picture. Haven't we all felt that way? This was written as a stream-of-consciousness article. The ideas flow from one to the next, but a little space between paragraphs would make it easier to read. Good job!
Sherril Wendling
06/20/06
Thanks for the honesty! And for the nice wrap-up in the end--His love fills those places. (Another thing that'll do it is taking part in the FW writing challenge. You won't have nearly so much time to shop!)

You have an excellent way with words. Organizing your piece into paragraphs, separated by a space between, will help your readers do you justice!