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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Hope (05/04/06)
My Only Hope

You have reached the Ryland’s. Please leave a message after the beep. “Beep” “Hi Mom, this is Cassie. I wanted to let you know that I am leaving school right now to drive up to Rachel’s wedding. It is snowing a little so I will be taking 81 to avoid going over the pass. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Wow, those clouds look ominous. I hope this storm isn’t going to get any worse. Cassie jumped into her bright blue Mustang, put on her seat belt, and headed down the road.

The sun started it’s descent over the hills and darkness filled Cassie’s car. The snowflakes fell faster and harder, making it difficult to drive. Is there something in the road? I can’t see very well. Cassie turned up her defrost, yet the snow on the windshield piled up so fast her vision was still obstructed. Suddenly, her eyes met the bright glaring of a deer. Cassie slammed on the brakes, causing her car to spin. “Oh God, help me!” Her Mustang spun twice, hit a sign, and tumbled three times down a hill. All went silent. The snow continued to fall.

“Where am I? Ouch, my head hurts! I can’t see.” Cassie was coming to and could feel the restraints of her seatbelt holding her in place upside down. She moved her hands around the inside of the car, trying to get her bearings. I’ve been in an accident. Oh, God I hurt! How will anyone find me tonight? “Heeeelp! Please somebody help me!” Cassie screamed in desperation. Complete silence. Despair flooded Cassie’s heart as her eyes filled with tears.

Pain cursed through Cassie’s body. I have to figure out how to undo this seatbelt or my head will explode. There’s the latch. Bang! "Ow, I think my ribs are broken." Cassie did the best she could to turn her broken body around on the roof of her car. “I can’t move. Oh, God please send someone to help me! You’re my only hope.”

Meanwhile, a couple, twenty miles away, snuggled close to their fireplace and sipped hot coffee. “Rose, I have to leave early for work tonight. I got a flat tire on the plow this morning and with all this snow it’ll be a long night. The sooner I get started, the sooner I can come home.”

I understand Jimmy, said Rose. The snow is thick so please be careful plowing tonight.”
Jimmy kissed his wife, put on his warm clothing, and headed out the door.

Jimmy had to scrape twelve inches of snow off his windshield. This is going to be one heck of a night. He usually took Highway 15, but tonight he decided to go 81. Maybe I can reach the shop quicker this way. Jimmy was driving slow, but steady, through the snowstorm. He wasn’t but fifteen minutes from his house before he approached the corner where Cassie had her accident. Jimmy saw the sign and said, “This is strange. That sign wasn’t pointing down the hill yesterday. I wonder what happened.” He rounded the corner and kept driving, until he had the feeling he needed to go back. That sign is a sign. Oh, that is crazy, but just the same, I am going to find out.

Jimmy pulled up next to the sign, shined his flashlight all around, and then down the hill. His light managed to reflect off Cassie’s mirror. “What is that?” Jimmy plodded through the freshly fallen snow until he came upon Cassie’s car. The car was so buried he had to dig through the snow. Cassie, coming in and out of consciousness, whimpered quietly. “Thank God, someone is alive.” Jimmy yelled into the car, “Are you ok in there?”

Cassie weakly said, “Help me, I can’t move.”

“I am going to call for help. I’ll be right back.” Jimmy raced up the hill out of breath and called 911. He fumbled around in his truck, found a blanket, and ran back to Cassie.

Jimmy crawled into the crinkled car and wrapped her up, staying right at her side. “I thought there wasn’t hope of anyone finding me tonight,” Cassie said.

“Well, young lady, you are lucky, in a strange sort of way. You hit the sign just right, causing it to point to your exact location and I just happened to be on the road early tonight because I had a flat tire to fix.”

Cassie closed her eyes and quietly said, “Thank you, Lord.”
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This article has been read 961 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Lynda Schultz 
05/12/06
Enjoyed this. Nicely done.
Helen Paynter
05/13/06
I also enjoyed this. Just be careful with your quotation marks - sometimes you leave them out, which tends to leave the reader struggling to work out where speeches begin and end. It's not difficult to do, but it is distracting, which is a shame, because it's a good story.
Dr. Sharon Schuetz
05/14/06
You did a good job telling this story. I really enjoyed it.
Val Clark
05/18/06
Very visual story, your ability to describe and draw the reader into the 'place' of the story is excellent. You make the transition from one point of view to the other with ease and you build the drama well by having the driver miss the turn. 'The sun started it’s....' You probably already know this but you only use 'it’s' when joining the two words it and is. Well done!