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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: THE UGLY TOURIST (07/09/15)
The strength of my walls calls to them, but they do not hear. My colored windows
beckon them to awe at my glory, but they do not feel. The travelers, they come from
near and far. They come proud and confident in their present and close their eyes to my past. Oh the stories I could tell them. Oh the warnings I could give. Alas, they do not wish to seek out my secrets but to snap their picture and tick their list.

My sacred steps were once stained with the blood of the saints as they battled
injustice. Now they are where these travelers buy their worthless wares from fools.
My benches were once the measuring rod that found king and peasant equal in their
quest for wisdom and mercy. Now they are a mere holder for these thoughtless travelers refuse. They take for granted my sanctuary. They glance at my beauty. They find me wasted and useless compared to their faculties. To this ignorant traveler I will remain cold & dark. I will disregard them as they do me.

Oh travelers heed my words! Open your eyes! Seek and find and be changed! For
the one who chooses not to see, who chooses not to hear, there is not greater fool
than he.

How I long for those who will look. To those few I would share my
wealth. I would instruct as a caring teacher. I would reveal my beauty to the ones who, into my depths, dare to peer. Who dare to ask ‘What happened here?’
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This article has been read 733 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 
07/16/15
This is quite beautiful. I had a lump in my throat as I read this. It was pure poetry.

I'd encourage you to write out the word, and, instead of using an ampersand. Also in the phrase, traveler's refuse, you forgot the apostrophe to show possession. I also noticed for such a short piece, you did use the word traveler a few times. You may want to consider switching it up with visitor or tourist.

Overall, I think you nailed the topic in a fresh and original way. You painted a picture of the cliché, if the walls could talk. I think it was lovely, and it's a story I won't forget. It made me stop and think, which is always a good thing.
C D Swanson 
07/17/15
Fabulous!

I loved this.

God bless~
Loni Bowden-Horn 
07/17/15
This was a powerful piece done with a short amount of words. I noticed a few grammatical mistakes that have already been mentioned. This a thought provoking piece.
Rebecca Bithyah
07/23/15
Well, this got me going with its poetic, well formed imagery. My favourite line was 'My benches were once the measuring rod that found king and peasant equal in their
quest for wisdom and mercy.'
Such creative use of POV and a thoughtful, incisive take on the life of a church.
Will remember this one.