The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 764 times
Member Comments
A few grammar mistakes: "I done..." and "my parents seen...". Do I sound just like your father? I like the hopeful end of your essay, where you are looking forward to spring. Work on improving the little mechanical things; you have a good "voice."
I really enjoyed reading through your story--and the outcome. Just great. God bless ya, littlelight
A couple of tense changes and some spacing would help but otherwise it was a very good read. You transported me to a time with I looked at my own upbringing. One other suggestion is to maybe shorten your opening paragraph to grab the reader and then elaborate more in the second one. Hope that helps some!:)
I'm sorry - I couldn't get past the "bleeps" in grammar to finish this story. Need to polish up on proper grammar, then try again. Good Luck!
this is a hopeful article :) but, remember that there is life even in the winter. you don't have to wait until spring

Look around even though you see no flowers life goes on underground.

Keep on keeping on.
I Like this:
“If I had the job of judging myself, I would declare that you can stick the fork in me now, I’m done. I don’t have that job though, thank God.” Amen, only God.
Thank for sharing. God Bless, Helen