Trapped | Previous Challenge Entry

how it works

TITLE: Trapped | Previous Challenge Entry
By Janet Kelly
01/29/14
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TRAPPED

Another day was dawning and though the sun shone brightly darkness engulfed me. The depression covered me like a blanket. I felt trapped in a tunnel of darkness that made getting out of bed each day a chore. I could not find my way out. I felt hopeless and alone.

The scene from a few weeks ago was still playing in my head. It was like a horror movie I could not turn off. Every detail was still fresh in my mind. Bill's sudden death had shaken me to the core. I could still see his body lying lifeless on the ground. The heart attack had come on without warning. Suddenly the love of my life was gone.

At least today was Saturday and I did not have to worry about doing anything productive. All I had to do was just go through the motions of living. My arms felt so empty. I cried myself to sleep every night. My tear stained pillow was my only companion.

I made my way to the kitchen and the coffeemaker. I turned on the coffee and began to pray “Dear Lord please remove the darkness from me. I need your help. I can't do this anymore.” The coffee finished brewing, I poured myself a cup and sat down on the living room sofa. I picked up my Bible, a birthday gift from Bill, from the coffee table. My eyes welled up with tears as that memory surfaced.

There must be some hope, some light, some comfort in this Word. Bill often reminded me that in Hebrews 13:5 God promises us that He will never leave us alone or forsake us. If that is true there must be some promises in this Word. Surely there is comfort for me, and a light to lead me out of this darkness.

Frantically I began to flip through the pages asking God to bring these verses to me! Then I saw it! The first verse was one of my favorites, Hebrews 6:19, “Which we have as an anchor of the soul, both sure and steadfast.....” This hope in Jesus Christ we have as an anchor. Christ is my ANCHOR!
One by one the verses began popping like popcorn off the pages into my heart.

I was overwhelmed by all the promises of hope and light that God showed me. As I read verse after verse, something inside me began to break. I wept unashamedly, sobbing, and crying out to God.
The message was clear. I must cling to the anchor of my soul. He is my only hope to keep me from drowning in this sea of depression.

I felt Jesus wrap His arms of love and comfort around me. He had been there all along, I just had not been able to find Him in my darkness. Now I could feel His presence. I knew I had someone to carry me when I could not walk. Someone to hold me up when I could not stand. Isaiah 41:10 says “Fear not, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your God . I will strengthen you. Yes, I will help you. I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Regardless of the days ahead, I will, with God's help, claw my way out of the darkness. I will cling to the anchor of my soul. He will lead me out.

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