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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Expect (07/11/13)
Two pink lines magically appear on a white stick
Two hearts fill with exuberant expectation
Seven friends hear a secret whispered into their ears
Many eyes light with joy
Many smiles paint the faces of the quiet collective


Two cheeks turn pale green
Two lips purse behind a cupped hand
Two dizzy eyes
Zero food consumed
Twenty onlookers guess the secret


One pair of fitting pants
Eight pm bedtimes
Two pm naps
Zero cups of coffee
Two dozen grapefruit in the fridge


Nine am appointment with a loving doctor
Ten pages of paperwork
Many wishes of congratulations
One tiny heart beating
Two parents wait to tell the world


Two scary doctor reports stop momentum
Five days of bleeding bring concern
One puppy lays across mommy’s belly for comfort
One day of sheer physical pain clears mommy’s mind


One confident husband says, “Expect the baby to be fine.”
Hundreds of prayers go up to heaven
One God anoints the heart of a worried mom


Eleven am doctor appointment
One waiting room fills with laughter and calmness
One empty circle on an ultrasound screen
One doctor gently says, “What we have here is a miscarriage.”
One moment of shock ebbs into peace deeper than she’s ever known
One mommy knows her baby’s in heaven
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This article has been read 698 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 
07/18/13
This is a clever way to take the reader on the journey from a positive pregnancy test to the agonizing miscarriage to faith in God. This is one of those pieces that needs to be read twice today fully appreciate all the nuances. I think you covered the topic In a creative way. Pregnancy is the epitome of expectations.
Larry Whittington
07/20/13
And I remember after about 68 years that I was to have had another sister.

Powerful.

For ease of reading, what would it look like with capital "AM's and "PM's"

The ending may bring peace to any who have experienced this.

Genia Gilbert
07/22/13
Unique approach to the topic; excellent example of expecting, then bitter disappointment. You leave it with a hopeful and faith filled ending, though. Good writing.
C D Swanson 
07/23/13
Aww...this was so clever and so different in the approach to the topic, and yet completely on topic. It was a pleasure to read. Thanks.

God bless~
Nancy Bucca
07/24/13
You do a great job showing as opposed to telling, bringing us up to that "expectation" part, knowing there will be a let down at the end. The line about "one mommy" expecting her baby is in heaven wraps it up beautifully.
C D Swanson 
07/25/13
Congrats! God bless~
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 
07/28/13
Congratulations on ranking 4th in level 1 and 33 overall! (The highest rankings can be found on the message boards.)