Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Blessed (10/11/12)
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TITLE: Donovan's Blessings | Previous Challenge Entry
By Sharon Cooper
10/17/12 -
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“My how the day passes so quick,” he thought to himself.
“The days are getting shorter. It’ll soon be winter. Seems like only yesterday Maddie and I had just gotten married and moved into this one room cabin. And now our children have families of their own. My sweet Maddie is with the Lord now. It won’t be long before I’ll go home to be with my Lord. My, how he has blessed me through the years. Though this cabin is still small, it does have 2 bedrooms and a kitchen now. I built the kitchen for Maddie. She said she wanted a separate room where she could cook. Never could deny Maddie. Whatever she wanted, I tried to get for her. There were times though when there just wasn’t enough money to spoil her the way I wanted.
We always had food to eat, though there wasn’t always a lot left over. I was able to grow some vegetables. I still plant a little garden, but it get harder each year with my advancing age and failing health. We didn’t have the best clothes, but Maddie and the children never complained. The children went to school and made fine adults. I sure am proud of them.
The boy Buster is the sheriff in town. He and his wife Molly don’t live very far away. My daughter Mary and her husband Dalton don’t live very far either. Mary and Molly comes to see me. They make sure I’m well and take medicine. Never have liked to take medicine, but the Doctor says I need some for my heart. I know Molly and Mary mean well, so I just let them have their say. Dalton and Buster have come over to make some repairs to the house. Used to I could do all those repairs, but it seems with my heart and all, I’m just not able to do the repairs for myself.
It is such a joy to see the grandkids. Mary and Dalton wants me to live with them. I don’t think I’ll do that. They’re busy raising their own family. Buster and Molly says that I need someone to look after me. They’ve been after me to move in with them too. But like I said before, they also have a family to raise. The kids don’t need an old man under foot all the time too. Maddie was here when she died, and I’ll be here when I go to be with the Lord.
Well, I’d better go to bed. Don’t want to waste the kerosene. Have a lot to do tomorrow. Need to go to town and pick up a few things. Maybe I’ll stop by and see the grandkids. Should make it home by dark. Good night, sweet Maddie."
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Colin (Gold Member)
I noted some tiny red ink. In this: Mary and Molly comes
It should be come. I also noticed you capitalized the Doctor. If you put a qualifier in front like the or my then it's lowercase but if you use it as a name--Good morning Doctor--then you capitalize it.
You did a wonderful job of writing on topic. I also thought your message is one everyone needs to hear from time to time. I enjoyed the ending. I think it could be read a couple of ways. One that he was just getting in the car and going home or 2. perhaps he sensed something and knew he would be seeing Maddie quite soon in Heaven. Personally I like that it is open-ended like that because each reader depending on her needs at the exact moment she reads it will choose the ending that she needs. God will make sure of that. This was a wonderful read.
God Bless~