The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 396 times
Member Comments
This was an enjoyable story. Quite an adventure for city people!
Ewww, I shudder just thinking about it!

My suggestion would be to paragraph more carfeully. For example, your first paragraph should be three--start with the mother, then the son gets his own paragraph, then back to the mother.

I'd love to see more of these characters--I bet they have more stories to tell!
I liked the characterisation of the son
Great job describing this little mother/son exchange and the "joys" of rugged country life. It's one of those situations where you really need to know the source of the smell, but really DON'T want to know. I agree with Jan's comment re: the paragraph spacing. I'm sure all the great memories you made with your extended family during that time made suffering through these types of challenges worth it. Plus, the challenges themselves probably have made for some great stories - like this one!
Having lived out in the middle of nowhere for most of my life, I couldn't help but empathize with the poor mother as I chuckled to myself.