Control | Previous Challenge Entry

how it works

TITLE: Control | Previous Challenge Entry
By Jordan D
09/07/08
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I couldn't take it anymore. I was holding on with every bit of strength that I had left, but it was over. I had failed, and I could do nothing about it. Life was coming at me from all sides. I was being pulled one direction, and then another.

The pressure never ceased, but instead gradually became stronger and stronger until it came to the point where I could no longer bear it, to where I am now. At least I could say that I tried. I never gave up. Even now, when my fate is doomed, I refuse to give in without a fight. I will push through the pains until it becomes impossible.

It's getting worse. I am wearing out, and beginning to thin even more. It is pointless, one tiny piece of a frayed rope holding two relentless ends together, but I am determined to do my job. I am all that is left holding the two pieces of my frayed world together.

The end is near. I summon up all I have left, but it is not enough. With one last tug, I lose my grip, let go, and snap.

It should be over. I shouldn't still be here. I lost my control over the two worlds that I was holding together, and everything should have fallen apart by now. But I hear laughter, I hear voices. One voice above the rest, although I still can't make it out...

Something is placed in both of my hands. It is the ropes that I had dropped, the ropes that I had thought broke, had snapped because of me. I have them, but I no longer feel as if I have control. There are hands over my own, hands that are bigger and stronger.

I hear the whisper of someone greater than me take the ropes from my hands. At first, I refuse to let go. What does this perfect stranger know about taking care of the most important thing in my life? I won't let him have it. He could mess it up.

But as soon as these thoughts enter my mind, the tugging begins to increase again. I am reminded that I am not strong enough to handle this, and beg for the stronger hands to come back. I beg them to help me again. Maybe, as long as I'm holding on to the ropes as well, it won't be so bad. I might not have all of the control, but some of it, at least.

The hands are back, but this time, they try to slide mine away. I won't have this. I hold on tighter, although the tugging burns my hands. I cry out in pain, but refuse to let go. I'd rather hold my life together myself than leave it in the grip of someone else.

Do you not want to be out there enjoying life yourself, instead of trying to do my job?
I start at the deep voice behind me.

That stops me for a moment. What did He mean, trying to do His job? Wasn't this my job? I couldn't imagine doing anything else. All my life, I'd been taught to do this, to take the responsibility for everyone else.

Let go.

I can't move for a moment. But I know that it's true. It was either trust my everything to the man behind me, or live a life of agony.

I try one last time. I summon up all I have left, but it is not enough. With one last tug, I lose my grip, let go, and leave the control to the stranger behind me.

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