The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
Oh my! This is so sad! I really felt bad for the girl, especially on her sweet 16, that is a rough thing to deal with. The last line barely offers some hope for her. I noticed one typo "With all do respect" do should be 'due' but otherwise, this was good-hearbreaking! Nice job with pulling the reader in. ^_^
08/21/08
I did love this story. The way it built up as it went along. I was not sure where it was going at first, but you slowly brought it all to a head. Almost like it was meant to continue. Very Good!
08/23/08
Very sad...with just the right amount of hope at the end.
08/25/08
A sad, heartbreaking situation, with thankfully, a truly hopeful ending. Keep writing.