Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Illustrate the meaning of "Every Dark Cloud has a Silver Lining" (without using the actual phrase or literal example). (02/28/08)
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TITLE: The Reunion | Previous Challenge Entry
By Pamela Nastase
03/06/08 -
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“That’s Mike, our Class President,” Jason whispered into her dark curls indicating the man checking a list.
Mike turned and asked for her name.
“Mike, you don’t remember me?” Paulina asked incredulously with her brown eyes wide.
The man looked startled.
“Seriously?” she continued, her eyes sparkling. “I can’t believe it,” she said with pretend devastation. Mike stuttered an apology.
Jason came to his rescue with a laugh. “She’s pulling your leg. I’m the one who went here, not her.”
Mike shook his head, laughing, too. “She’s good, I’ll give her that!” he grinned as he handed them their nametags.
They entered the decorated room, talking to small clusters of people they passed. Paulina wasn’t the least bit shy, so Jason tended to rely on her to get conversations started. Especially now, since most people didn’t recognize him--he grew six inches after High School. They filled their plates with the typical catered food, Paulina still seeking out the people who looked the most uncomfortable to try to put them at ease. Before long, she’d gathered a full table, and she and Jason entertained them with stories of the disastrous kitchen remodel that took place their first two months of marriage.
Paulina loved going out with Jason and he was proud to show off his bride of seven months. They ate the bland food, danced the slow dances, and talked animatedly.
Near the end of the evening, a woman passing their table suddenly interrupted the conversation. “I remember you!” she exclaimed, pointing at Jason.
He stood up happily, almost knocking over his chair, to give her a hug. They talked for a minute while Paulina stared at the backside of Jason’s suit. She finally yanked on his arm. Off balance, he sat down. She stuck her head over his arm, smiling, “Hi. I’m his wife, Paulina.”
“Oh, yeah. Sorry,” he interjected and continued to catch up with the woman whose name Paulina missed.
Finally, the woman left and Jason ignorantly threw his arm back around Paulina and chatted with their tablemates.
“We’re here to have a good time, so I’m going to wait to talk to him on the way home,” Paulina commanded herself. “But I can’t believe he did that, Lord. It was so rude! I can’t believe he ignored me like that and didn’t even introduce me to her!”
Well, how many people did you introduce Me to?
The question humbled her. And the living example stayed with her long after the reunion ended.
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You might want to examine your use of adverbs; for example, how does one throw an arm around someone's shoulders "ignorantly"? And I'm not sure that I see the "silver lining" here.
This may be the beginning of a fine longer work, examining this couple's relationship. Both of them interested me a great deal.
Perhaps obliviously would work better than ignorantly.
Pauline sounded like a fun person.
I had to read the ending twice before I realized that the Lord was speaking. You might have led into it a little more.
Good description, good dialogue, good lesson.
Keep writing.
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