The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
11/16/07
Great story and well-written. I would have liked more of the main character's feelings about receiving the money and the encouragement the gift brought. Just my opinion, though.
11/18/07
Now THAT'S encouragement! The build-up was very effective. I also think more focus on the feelings the MC had due to the gift would strengthen this a bit. Very good.