The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
05/03/07
Good job with these folks--I know each of them (and saw a little bit of myself, too.)

It might be more effective to alternate each "character" with a verse or two commenting on their behaviors and motives. Not all of your readers will look up the verses, but they'll read them if they're incorporated into the text.

Your writing is straight from the heart.
Good devotional. Sobering thought.
Thanks for the reminder that we all fall short. The point you make is excellent.