The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 1210 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
I love how you wove a lesson into this story. Great job-and good topic with the hummingbirds :)
11/04/06
A very good lesson here - a bit of work on your grammar would help it flow better. I enjoyed this!
11/05/06
Very good.
Your thoughts presented here are excellent. I think that you could put more emphasis on the topic, and could have spent more time developing the lesson. Your paragraph beginning "how many people..." would be a good one to expand. That's just my opinion. Also, watch your punctuation. I noticed several run-on sentences. Do keep writing! You have put together a wonderful illustration of truth.