Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Vision (08/03/06)
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TITLE: Mrs. Murphy's Morning | Previous Challenge Entry
By J Mitchell
08/08/06 -
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Perched on the porch step, a dirty faced yard youngen looks questioningly up at her Granny.
“Mrs. Murphy said she had a vision this morning.”
“Really” Replied Granny, reluctant to carry her end of the conversation.
“Yes’m,” she said “She seen her late husband standing in the front of the screen door, silently beckoning her to come with him.”
Granny stops the rocker, eases her crochet into her lap, launched another amber stream, and thoughtfully states.
“I’ve known Gladys since we were kids, she was always seeing spooks and terribly afraid to go out into the dark. I wouldn’t take it serious if I were you Molly, it’s just her imagination.”
“I asked her if it weren’t just a wakening up dream,” Molly replied, as she shifted to a better shaded position on the step, “She told me it weren’t no dream, it was a real heaven sent vision.”
“Gladys wouldn’t know the difference between a vision and the garbage man, collecting trash, child.”
“Yes mame, but that ain’t all. She saw an angel sitting at her kitchen table drinking coffee from her own cup.”
“Now, I know she is just making it all up, angels don’t drink coffee, just like they don’t smoke or do any other vice which wouldn’t please God.”
“There is one more thing Granny.”
“What else did Gladys tell ya?”
“She said she hadn’t been able to sleep for a week, and she reckons this all adds up to her about to receive life’s final reward.”
“No, can’t be,” Granny gestures. and quickly expels another mouth full of snuff laden juice.
“Why not Granny?”
“It’s that new brand of coffee she been drinking lately, the one with the chickary in it, that’s what keeps her up at night, and causing all this vision nonsense. We’ve been good friends too long for me not to know her better than she knows her own self. I’d say all she needs is to leave off that coffee, and get a little rest.”
“I think you’re right Granny, replied Molly, while she picks at a scab on her crusty knee, and then thumps it into the yard.
Granny gives her a despairing look, and spit another stream into the yard.
“I know I’m right. Like I said, I know her like a book.”
“I think she’ll be alright now, Granny.”
“How come?”
“Well while she was talking to me about the near after…”
“That’s ‘hereafter’ I think,” interrupts Granny.
“Anyways, Mrs. Murphy looked up through the quilting frame, hanging in her Living room, and turned near white as if she seen another vision, then she drops her head, gurgles a little and falls dead asleep in her old chair. I couldn’t get her to wake up, so I left her there to rest. When she wakes up, after a good sleep, she’ll be better.”
Suddenly, the rocker is completely still. Molly senses Granny’s quiet stare, and feels the intensity of the moment. Finally, with a repentant uneasy voice, the old lady brakes the paralyzing silence.
“You know baby, …I’m afraid, I might just be wrong.”
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A few spelling errors. I also noticed the story is written in both past and present tense; it would be good to stick to one or the other.
Thanks for sharing!