The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
10/21/10
This is such a compelling and well-written story. In situations like these, there are no heroes. But you found one in Buster. Great job.
This is nicely done. It wasn't what I was expecting at all but that's a great thing. Excellent job of weaving a believable thrilling story. I'd love to see the whole story turned into a novel. It could easily be done!
10/23/10
Wow! I admit I had to smile at the name "'Buster' Brown," but once I got into the story I was hooked. Such a great story line here! I love how you used this story to show a chilling application of the scripture about laying your life down for your friends. Awesomely written!
You held this reader throughout the whole story...great storyline and well told...you sort of have a whole novel tucked into 750 words. Nicely done!
Ooooh, write the book. I'll read it! Good job!
Great story! Good job. :) I'd love to see what happens next.
10/25/10
This is an excellent story and it has it all...strong dialogue, intrigue, mystery, a hero..well done.
10/25/10
Suspensful! Kept me trying to run ahead, to see what was going to happen next.

Loved it.
10/27/10
Very engaging story--lots of great details here.

I think you had a larger-than-750 words story here, and it bogs down a little in the middle when the truth is being revealed to the chaplain.

Nevertheless, I was really hooked, and my heart went out to this man who had sacrificed everything.
Congratulations on placing 36th overall.