My husband and I had an argument this morning. After 43 years of marriage, we still disagree on things. This morning, it was about pillows.
He didn’t like his new pillow. He said it was too firm and hurt his neck; he didn’t sleep all night. He wanted to go back to the store and get a “soft” because the “medium” was too firm. I told him that he had chosen to get the “firm” one. He didn’t remember it that way. “I told you I wanted the medium, even though it was pink. You told me no one would know it was pink since it would have a pillow case on it. Don’t you remember?”
The truth of the matter is, we spent quite a while deciding on which pillow he wanted. He did choose the firm one (if I remember correctly.)
“The problem is,” I told him, “that you forget that you have a memory problem. You forget that you forget.”
He almost became insulted. “I do not forget. My mind is as sharp as a tack and I do not forget things. You forget things.”
Yes, I do. I forget things. Sometimes they are very important things. But I remember what I can remember. I forget the things I forget. But unfortunately, I forget that he forgets and expect that he will remember. He forgets that I forget that he forgets and then he gets mad at me because I don’t remember.
So what’s worse than forgetting?
Forgetting that you forget. And then forgetting that the one you love forgets because then you get angry because he forgets.
Remembering can be very time-consuming; but forgetting can be worse because you have to waste a lot of time trying to remember what it was you forgot.
The only time forgetting is time-consuming is when you remember that you forgot and, therefore, you spend a lot of time figuring out what it was you forgot so you can remember it.
Forgetting that you forget is exhausting because you constantly rack your brain trying to figure out if you have forgotten something – especially something important. However, if you are blessed enough to remember that you forget, then you actually become much more organized. You write yourself notes. You make endless lists. You remember something you need to do but , because you remember that you forget, you go and do it right then so you won’t forget to do it.
For a haphazardly organized person like me, forgetting can be a blessing in disguise. It’s always good for an excuse, especially to someone else who also forgets. It’s also good for a healthy dose of guilt to teach you to take better steps next time to be sure you don’t forget. And it can provide motivation to find the source of your forgetfulness so you can take measures to help your mind and body get in better shape so it won’t forget. You exercise more; you play mind-strengthening games. And you heavily invest in sticky notes.
Job 1:21 says “...The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away...”Romans 8:26 says, “...the Spirit also helps us in our weaknesses...” and in verse 28, “...we know that all things work together for good to those who love God...” (NKJV)
As a rule, it is not good to take several verses of the Word and put them together to make a truth. But I think it’s okay to use several scriptures to help make a true point: even when we begin to forget, God helps us.
We age. We begin to forget. We can succumb to fear when we begin to forget; or we can rest in the relationship with God we have spent years developing and be content that He is always watching over our lives helping us in our infirmities, walking with us and showing us which way to go.
Even when we forget.
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