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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Savory to the Taste (07/26/12)

TITLE: Not So Savory After All
By Jeanette Oestermyer
08/01/12


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“A lot of drinks and foods are savory to the taste, but that doesn’t mean you should drink or eat everything that tastes good”, said Dan and Lisa’s Father. “Remember, when Jesus offered the woman at the well living water and I know you Dan, but alcohol is not living water. “Oh no Dad,” Dan said “I have learned in my Bible study and Mrs. Evans, our Sunday- School teacher, has explained all about that.”

“No, you do not drink any alcohol because if you drink one glass, it may lead to another glass and another and on it goes. You can get into big trouble when you’re drunk and I do not want to ever hear of it happening to you. If you get into trouble like that, you will be in worse trouble at home.”

“But Dad, I think somewhere it says one should not drink or eat any food or drink to gluttony. So why couldn’t we have just one drink. I suppose if I ate too much food because it was so good and then I got sick that would be okay.”

“The Bible does not condone drinking alcohol for any reason or in any amount, period especially when you are not at the age designated by the law”.

“Does either of you know who is out there in the world trying to find a way to fool you into doing something naughty or sinful?”

Lisa (15 years of age) quickly answered, “I do, it is Satan, the devil and he tries to get us in trouble by getting us to drink or eat something just because it tastes good. We need to discover and know that the devil is trying to get us to do something bad”.

A few months went by, at least that is what Dan felt, and he and some of his friends wanted to go out on a Saturday night and drink just a little. First they went to a party at one boy’s house where the boy’s parents were not at home. They trusted him just as Dan’s parents trusted him even though they had never left him at home with Lisa when they were on a vacation or other reasons for being away from home for a longer time.

The party was at Andrew’s house and he was about the age of Dan. They did have some beer and were singing and dancing with girls when a knock came at the door. Andrew answered and saw the police officer standing there. The party goers were not making a lot of noise and they did not appear drunk.

The officer asked Andrew if their parents were home and if they had alcohol. Then Dan also came to the door and tried to convince the officer that they were only allowed two small glasses of beer and they didn’t want to get drunk.

“Since your parents are not at home and there is beer available, I know this is Andrew’s home and Dan you are too young to be drinking, so we are going to call your parents and tell them to come and get you, which is probably true for the rest of you.”

When Dan’s father got the call, he was upset and hurried out of the house and left to pick up Dan. He wondered if Dan was drunk or not and he knew that he would give Dan a lecture again about not drinking.

Dan’s father went straight to where Andrew lived and there were several other cars parked waiting for their children. When Dan saw his car, he came out and got into the car with his Dad.

“Why did you do this, Dan? I told you what would happen and now you are not going out at night alone or with a friend for the rest of the month. You just had to try and see if you could get away with this. Didn’t I tell you that Satin would try every trick he could think of to get you to do exactly what you did. ”I hope you and Andrew and all the other kids have learned a lesson tonight.”

“I think we should go home and say some prayers admitting how you disobeyed me and the Lord. You have to keep Him in all that you do and He will help keep you out of trouble. You should also repent for this sin."


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This article has been read 184 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Nancy Bucca 08/04/12
There's a good message in this, and a good buildup with the story line, yet it seems to end too soon. I'd like to know more about how Dan feels about what he did. Perhaps the word count was a hindrance; stories like this often take more time to tell than you have when you're confined to a limited number of words.

This did keep my attention and has the potential to be a real page turner. I'd love to know what happens next.


CD Swanson 08/05/12
You did a wonderful job with this entertaining piece.

You told about the pitfalls of disobedience without coming off as "preachy" allowing the reader to take the message and morale of the story freely.

I liked it very much! Good job. Thanks. GOd bless~
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 08/08/12
This is a creative story. It has a lot of potential and covers topics that every parent worries about.

You had some errors like the punctuation should go inside the quote marks. Also when a new person is speaking, make sure you start a new paragraph, even if it's just ine word. A challenge buddy or critique group would help you catch those things.

I think this is such an important message. Even kids who grow up in a good and stable home can make mistakes. We always told our kids if they ever found themselves in a situation like that to call-no questions asked until morning. Doing things like knowing the kids who are friends, and communicate with their parents can all help deter a kid from experimenting with alcohol. My son told me that what influenced him the most was that we didn't drink. He had friends who didn't listen to their parents because the parents didn't set a good example. Nice job.