The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
03/14/08
Very vivid, and right on topic.
This is not only clever and creative, but it has a strong message packed in, as well. Very well done.
A very creative way to get the point across! And right on topic, too.
Creative and on topic. Nicely written for the most part. I think there are some tense changes throughout, but maybe I'm reading it wrong! I loved the demon names.
03/18/08
Apathy is certainly one of the best strategies of the enemy. I'm a sucker for spiritual warfare stories!

I think the story needs an element to demonstrate that humans are not just pawns.

Also, I didn't see how what happened to the other higher up demon was relevant to making a point about guarding against apathy in our lives.

Other than that, you really caught my interest. I love the creativity of the names, and there is a lot of imagination here.
Fast paced and engaging. I was ready for more battle. Keep up the good words.
Gave me goosebumps reading this piece. Very clearly shown and not told, that's great writing! I liked this and especially how the story played out. What a message we all should take note of! Great job. ^_^