Other
I’m glad for all of the good and the bad that has been a part of my life. I really am. It has made me what I am. It had built my character and it is qualifying me for my promises. I didn’t like the negatives when I was going through them but I am grateful for them now – now that I can see what they were there for.
I am thrilled that I finally passed THAT test. I had to take it many times but it’s over. I’m not going to feel stupid for having to take it many times because I’m really now on top of this test taking thing. If it comes up again then I got it down. I understand there are going to be other tests and I will know how to prepare. I will qualify quicker each time. My repeated test-taking makes me more compassionate and prayerful toward those who don’t pass the tests that are so easy for me to pass.
I am glad I went through that church that didn’t realize that they are spiritually abusive. It made me personally search out for what scripture said about how Christian leaders should be and look like. I don’t rely on books or other teachers or other teachings. I researched it out for myself with God and the Bible. It trained me as a teacher who rightly divide the word. That experience leads me to check out the mentors of the leaders I am under. I check out their teaching to see if it is sound.
It makes me glad that I wasn’t in a rush for power or fame or position or title or even for my own ministry - so much so that I didn’t investigate the foundation of my structures. I won’t be fooled by false doctrine. That trial showed me that I can stand in that kind of battle and I can leave people to figure it out things for themselves in their own timing.
I am relieved that I finally got the healing from generational trauma and more so from the memory of it in my cells. Yep, this has been a good year. I am grateful for all the freedom and healing that I have. I will get more and more.
I am blessed to have never had the mental illness of so many of my relatives. I am grateful that when I was about to commit suicide that I had a God encounter otherwise I would be in hell. It’s great not to be in eternal anguish or even earthy mental anguish.
I am glad that when I had a herniated stomach that I didn’t have internal bleeding like that one gal. I’m glad there wasn’t any pain but I just knew something was wrong. I am glad the tumor that was taken out wasn’t cancerous though I did know that but the doctors seemed concerned. I am glad for the promise that I would feel better than ever.
I’m grateful that all of those bills were paid for and for the friends and ministries that helped me out. I still have regular bills to sort through but I believe those will be worked out. I have learned how to live in lack once again and I will learn to live with more than enough.
I am grateful for the small beginnings in my ministry. I am able to look failure in the face and say: you are part of my process – my artistic process and my entrepreneur process. I won’t cower or cry because of mistakes. I won’t yawn either but I won’t be so intimidated. I am shedding how my process looks and is interpreted by others – they can say what they want and I won’t be distracted anymore. I won't be as moved.
I am grateful for the real friends who have been there in my life and for my mentors and for all of the artistic opportunities that God gave along the way. I certainly did not deserve many of those opportunities – it was just God’s favor and quite frankly his direction. I didn’t deserve the rough patches either but that was just part of the game that I was willing to play.
Mostly, I am grateful for grace. I have failed a lot in the workplace and I need God’s grace for up ahead. I am no longer wanting or trying to have a conventional career path like everyone else. I am okay with this artistic journey and my unique path. I won’t bother explaining my difficult path to the jealous, or prove myself to my haters, or listen to the advice of those who do not have the mix of wisdom, artistic creativity, and entrepreneurialism. I will not listen any longer to the well-meaning who want me to be more practical. That's not my design.
I am happy that I am finally seeing the beauty of discerning of spirits and that really has been a long time coming but it has led to a settled rest. It has prevented me from wrong marriage partners and from going down any old ministry path. Mostly, it has prevented me from human idolatry. It came with its own unique difficulties and challenges but the good outweighs the negative. It is a good gift no matter how others react to it.
I look forward to a year of quality alignments and sharp discernment and wise choices along with God-given prosperity and joy. God has given me the gift of laughter that comes out when life seems most disturbing and that joy is showing me that life is not too overwhelming for God. He’s in control
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