Faith
My Conversion Testimony
Frederick T. Blue
May 31, 2016
“I have not always been a Christian.” Suffice it to say, I was a kid who like to bully other kids, and found pleasure in inflicting pain, both physically and emotionally. I look back now and recognize that it was my nature to act out like I did. Sure, I had the capacity to do good, which we all do since we were made in the image of God. But good is not good enough in God’s eyes. The Bible tells us “our righteous acts are like filthy rags” (Isaiah 64:6), so all the good in the world that we do would never earn us God’s favor. I stole from kids, physically harmed them, lied to friends and family and thought nothing of it for the most part. Sure, I knew I was doing wrong and on many occasions, I felt bad for what I did, but there was only remorse. I never felt like I was hurting or grieving a higher authority, just the person or people I hurt. For the most part, I was a good kid (at least that’s what I thought of myself), but I had the propensity to do some downright evil stuff.
“I realized I needed Jesus and received Him into my life when…” it dawned on me that I was not happy. I was a young kid, only seven years old, but I realized there was a real void in my life. My mother was the spiritual stalwart in our family and continually prayed for each of us in our family, including my older brother and sister, along with my father. I would witness the periodic prayer meetings and bible studies that would take place at a small apartment in the projects of West Philadelphia. Every Sunday, my mother would attempt to get us up for church and it was a struggle to say the least. She figuratively and literally dragged us to service which included Sunday school, devotions and worship, the sermon and call to salvation. We were in church almost as long as a day of school. I played church a great deal and joked with my friends as many of the adults would get up and jump around, arms flailing and at times, speaking in a language that I did not understand. After a while, it became less and less fun to ridicule church members for what we felt was foolish behavior. I started to feel convicted for what I was doing in church. It was as if I was offending a higher being rather than hurting the feelings of some church members and more importantly, my mother. In future services, I began to listen more intently to the pastor’s message, and subsequently, one night home, the Lord spoke directly to my heart. Yes, at the ripe old age of 7, I accepted Jesus Christ into my heart as Lord and Savior. I fully understood the message of salvation and the love and grace that God was bestowing upon little old me. I didn’t fully realize at the time that the journey of a lifelong relationship with God would encompass both peaks and valleys.
“The biggest change I have noticed in my life is...” the depth and breathe of God’s grace and mercy upon my life and the lives of others. My own experience encompassed a gradual process of both physical and spiritual growth. I fell of the wagon plenty of times as I made my way through high school and college, struggling with obedience and the life of holiness that God wanted me to strive for. But ever so present was His grace and hand on my life. God brought people in my life over the years that were there to encourage me and keep me accountable. Along the way, I experienced test and tragedy in my life that had me question God’s love and intentions, but beyond that, God has blessed me and my family abundantly. He has been Jehovah Jireh (“God our provider”) and Jehovah Rapha (“God our healer”) in every aspect of my life. He is also a patient and long-suffering God, awaiting creation to recognize who He is, what He’s done and how much He loves us all. Ephesians 2:8, 9, tells us that “For by grace we are saved, through faith and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God”, “not of works, lest any man should boast”. He Word tells us that He will never leave us or forsake us and wants us to come just as we are. We will never get it right on our own or gain His favor.
“May I share how something like this can happen to you?” It is God's will that all be saved. Take time to meditate and consider God's love for you (jOHN 3:16, Romans 3:23 and Romans 10:9,10)
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