Apologetics
The Knights of St. Calvin
The first thing I have to say will probably be most likely the first thing forgotten, especially by those who have already been outraged by the title and have drawn their swords in defense of their Patron Saint of Theology. And that is I have no issue with the vast army of people who subscribe to that which is popularly known as Calvinism and use the guidelines therein responsibly in order to gain a structured foothold into the scriptures and apply them to the Christian walk. Now that I’ve said that, it can be quickly forgotten, I’m sure, by those who would much prefer answer the clarion call and take up theological arms rather than understand a viewpoint.
Understanding, after all, takes a bit of effort and the willingness to step out around our theological bulwarks in order to appreciate a point of view and take it by its merits without immediately applying our own prejudices and demanding it fall into line with them. An unwillingness to do so is exactly the sort of thing that those whom I have dubbed “The Knights of St. Calvin” gleefully do with all authority, throwing stones from the glass cathedral of their own making.
But I get ahead of myself. Any theology, it must be recognized, is a tool, and one of man’s devising. It’s effective application with due respect to its inherent weaknesses can be responsibly used when a healthy dose perspective accompanies it. Again, and I’m sure this will be forgotten at some point along the way, for those that have such a perspective, really, there’s no issue to be had here. Theology when used with humility is a very beautiful thing.
The danger is when theology becomes elevated to the status of what can only be described as Holy Writ. Attacks upon theology are immediately seen as heresies and must be stamped out, demonized ,or at least shouted down because God needs defending and by staunch Defenders of the Faith, namely adherents to specific and accepted theological thought.
Not to say that there aren't hereies, far from it. But "heresy" is possibly one of the most misused concepts, often applied by rabid theologians to define anything Non-Their Theology.
Enter the Knights of St. Calvin. I’m not sure why it is, perhaps I missed reading the “Gospel According to St. Calvin” or the “Epistle of St. Calvin to All Believers”, but there seems to exist some brotherhood which is intolerant of all things non-Calvin. It’s not that I have some prejudice against a certain body of believers, heaven knows I didn’t go out on a knight errant’s mission lowering my lance at any and all who flew the banner of St. Calvin.
I’ve passed by the strongholds of St. Wesley, wandered through the lands of St. Luther even into the vast holdings of St. Pope De Jour and enjoyed a cheerful nod when they spy the cross upon my shield. We might even enjoy a mock combat to sharpen our skills and each part ways the better for it. Not so when the tulip bedecked pavilions of the Knights of St. Calvin come into view. Without the identifying livery of the celebrated Patron of Proper Thought, I am labeled as an Enemy of God and must be vanquished without quarter.
I wish I were exaggerating. I don’t know what it is about Calvinism and some of its more enthusiastic supporters that breed an active antagonism toward anything non-Calvin. Perhaps it is in the indoctrination which infers overtly or covertly that not only are Scriptures inerrant, but by association the tenants of Calvinism are as well. Thus, an attack upon the wisdom of Calvin is de facto an attack upon God, and is not to be tolerated. This isn’t just some accidental “falling-in-with-the-wrong-percentage-of-a random-selection-of-a-cross-section-of-a-demographic” thing, either. In my scriptural research while cruising the web I will peruse many different sites sponsored by a wide range of information providers, and it doesn’t take me long to discern that I am viewing a page and information provided by a Knight of St. Calvin. Somewhere on the page – and quite unprovoked as well -- will be expressed distain for any view other than the information given, or some reference to where other people believe , wrongly, something else. It seems the preservation and upholding of St. Calvin’s edicts is paramount, and even members who might be viewing missives directed at their own are staunchly reminded of what censures await for them should they attempt to entertain or compare ideas parallel to or (gasp) in conflict that which is patently the Accepted Truth.
Really, this kind of censure and antagonism seem to go hand and hand with anything identifiably Calvin. Even when I cruise through the cyberlands of St. Pope De Jour I don’t get this feeling that “Big Brother Bishop is Watching You” or catch snide snipes at those who may be of a “Protesting Persuasion” or overt allusions that any who don’t hold to all things issued from The Hallowed Popedom are by all accounts no better than, and are counted among the number of, ignorant jellyfish at best, raging Anti-Christ Wannabees worst case.
Again, and I know this will be conveniently forgotten, because after all, the entire issue here is that Calvinism is being attacked, as opposed to an examination of the attitudes, actions and prejudices of the Knights of Calvinism. And again, I’ve got nothing against adhering to a structured set of tenants and putting all one’s impassioned faith into its veracity. That’s entirely fair game, one is entitled to their convictions. To me, the issue is, when one takes those convictions to the next step and exhibit a blatant intolerance for nonconformance to what is ultimately a human’s preference to making sense of that which confounds our mortal mind.
Understand, I’m not even getting into the tenants of Calvinism where, after the smoke clears and it’s all said and done, the end product is a God I’m not even sure I’d like to make an acquaintance. Nor am I getting into a Calvinist version of prosthelytizing which, if any Knight of St. Calvin would be honest, would go something like this, “God loves you (maybe) and has a plan for your life (that plan might be that you will go straight to Hell, but don’t worry, in the end it is God’s glory you are contributing to in your agony, so buck up as you burn, you’re doing your part). Jesus Christ died for your sins (whoa, there, feller, I’m not necessarily talking to you, so don’t get too excited, yet), and all you need to do is… well, actually, there’s nothing to do, really. There, that ought to do it for my part. If you won the “elect lottery” this all ought to make perfect sense to you and you’ll be receiving your Salvation package right away. Remember, God will save you even if you don’t want Him to. On the other hand, if you’re not chosen, the message wasn’t meant for you, anyways , so I’m not going to waste any more time with you.”
Brutal, possibly. But honest, definitely.
It’s the ugly side that many Calvinist secretly believe but don’t verbalize – mostly because they are too busy putting their energies into trying to make Calvinist converts among the Lost of the Christian brethren rather than muddying through those who may or may not be elect.
I may sound unfair, and possibly so. But walk in my shoes for a time and ride through the countryside I have before making judgments as to how unfair my characterizations may be. Honestly, I’m not sure how people who lived in the B.C. age (Before Calvin) managed to get along with God without the guidance of the Knights of Calvin. Perhaps that’s the real meaning behind the term “Dark Ages”, I dunno.
Truly, even for the people who heard the words of Christ, its no wonder they shook their heads and said, “This teaching is too hard” without having His words well focused through the tulip shaped lens. Jesus just had to make due, I guess.
I anticipate that after my little rant is done, that I will be misunderstood for my meaning and intent, which is obviously to slight, malign, misrepresent, and mischaracterize all those who responsibly adhere to Calvinist tenants, because that’s what is important, after all, defending the image of Calvin – I’m sure that will be the take away. Not once will it enter the mind of the Knights of Calvin that this is a response to a blatant misuse of a perfectly valid belief system in order to perpetuate that which Jesus expressly condemned and found reprehensible in the Knights of Accepted Orthodoxy of His day.
I’m sure of it.
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You are quite a gifted writer, possessing the ability of humor, wit, sarcasm, and picutre painting. I found this article rather funny to read - not funny in a demeaning sense, but facetious. You locution is quite above the rest....But as to the content, I have another opinion. You see, as a Calvinist, I find it remarkable that many non-Calvinist just focus on TULIP and do not actually read Calvin himself. If someone actually were to read him, I think there opinion may change (you may have read him yourself, a feat not many dare delve into). It is Calvin's scintillating logic and passion for systmatizing God's message to his people that is admirable. His probing into man's psychology, faculties, and true need, are far deeper than we hear today. Today we only hear that "God loves you and so do I," therefore come to him and all things will be better - you can have "Your Best Life Now!" However, as Calvin, Luther, and the other Reformers understood, as well as Wesley I might add, is that our understanding of sin is essential to understand God's grace. But, you see, no one wants to talk about sin today. After all, we are American by birth, a fact which has come to mean that everyone is a child of God. Here are some questions I think every believer should ask themselves: 1) Why are the ideas of TULIP so offensive? 2)Why is it so necessary to champion free will as opposed to God's sovereignty? 3)Even if men were devoted, as you suggest, to St. Calvin, and sought to uphold his ideas over Scripture, would this mean that his ideas were unScriptural? 4)Is it possible for system of belief to be correct and its followers to live in contradiction to it?......Your comment near the end the article is that Calvinism is a valid belief system. This is exactly the problem - Christianity has been relegated to one belief among many - not THE truth. The problem with the church in America is that people dont want a "system" of beliefs, they want to know what they have to do. We have become a culture of therapy, self-esteem, and neurotic pragmatics. I am afraid that our Lord's words will ring true - when he returns, will he in fact find faith on the earth?