Marriage

---

"Stop it!" "You're the worst person I've ever known!" "You stupid jerk!" Sound familiar? They should. These unresolved outbursts of anger directed toward either member of a marriage are the first steps toward seeking divorce.

Irrational outbursts of anger always tend to bring about negative results. Constant application of these type of irrational acts deepens the beliefs of all things stated irrationally. Once the mind has stored enough negative aspects about a person to outweigh the positive aspects, divorce becomes inevitable. Nothing that person says or does will be taken as a good and loving act but merely as a devious contrivance. Once this occurs more and more arguments will become more pervasive. Nothing will seem to go right and divorce will be imminent.

We ask scientist and pyschologist why the divorce rate is so high. Why not ask ourselves? Only you and I can cause a divorce, so only you and I can solve the problem. Each individual is responsible for his own actions.

Perhaps a more rational effort is needed to perpetuate a workable marriage. Individuality is always the biggest problem in marriage. Either the husband or the wife wants the other to conform to their way of life, their thoughts, their wishes and their desires. When this doesn't occur, conflict arises and if not handled rationally, divorce becomes the cure. Married persons should respect each others' differences and come to an understanding that is workable for both of them. Views and opinions should be constantly stressed between them.

Rational actions should outweigh irrational actions by a landslide. Before you begin irrational arguments, sit back and analyze the situation that has necessitated this irrational argument. Amazingly, you will discover that it wasn't worth the anguish you were about to go through. When you get to the point where you want to scream and shout at your spouse for something, just think of all the beautiful things the person you want to put your frustrations off on is to you now or when you first married. Once this is done, smile and state your complaint in a calm and rational manner without regard to whether it is accepted the way you desire or not. Believe me, your point will be accepted as a complaint that warrants attention, and it will be acted upon just as rationally as it was presented. Besides, your cause for the complaint was just to make it known that something transpired that you didn't like, not to start a rebellion. These types of rational acts help to build a loving relationship and that's what marriage is all about.

Divorce is an illusion that past hurts will be healed by separation. We know this is a false notion. Remember the more you denigrate and demean your partner, the more likely you are to harbor those feelings inside you. Practice love and you'll reap love. Practice hate and spitefulness and you'll soon reap DIVORCE. It seems to me more prudent to reconcile and enjoy the person you vowed to love for life.

---

PLEASE ENCOURAGE AUTHOR BELOW LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE