Christian Living
Today is my wedding anniversary with my wife Imelda. We had long conversations and moments of love together at home. We also went on a date later during the day at Greenhills.
While waiting for her to arrive on our date, I wrote some of these thoughts.
I do praise and thank God for my wife. She is God's gift to my life. What is my life without her? It would be like a glass without living water.
When I first met Imelda in Quezon City while I was serving in a church several years ago, I did want to be loved. My desire is understandable, for love is known to give life a meaning. Love also lightens burdens.
But then, I did not understand exactly the total nature of love. I knew God loves all of us and all human beings are worthy of love. However, I needed to be helped. God uses my wife over the years to find this out and experience it.
Just this morning, my wife uttered the word "commitment." So let me reflect on this one. Marriage is commitment. It’s the awareness that marriage is meant to last until death. And because of that kind of commitment, when problems arise, they are worked out together.
Another thought that comes to my mind is "knowledge." Love is based on knowledge. I say this because how could you love someone you don't know? Over time, I get to know my wife more deeply. My love for her grew as this knowledge increases. It's love with insight.
"Understanding" is another thing that supports my wife's and I's love for another . It starts with an understanding that we are all the same, not different. We share the same hopes and fears. Love in a way is a discovery of myself in my wife.
I understand that my wife is imperfect and has needs, like me. This understanding allows me to accept her “shortcomings.” Yes, I can accept my wife's weaknesses for I also have weakenesses. It is not just a matter of forgiving each other, but of understanding each other.
"Giving" is another important thing I learned from my love for Imelda. Some young people say, “I want to meet a person who is rich and handsome.” What is not realized is that love is not about WANTING, but GIVING.
Love is the gift of yourself to another. “Immature love says,” according to Erich Fromm, “‘I love you because I need you.’ Mature love says, ‘I need you because I love you.’”
I choose to give to my wife because I love her. It's also the most important thing I can do for our three children -- Christine, Paul, and Angel: for me to love their mother.
I learned over the years with Imelda that marriage is not a noun; it’s a verb! It’s something you do. It’s the way I love my wife every day.
I thank God for his gift of love to me in Imelda. Such gift takes its place in my heart.
I dedicate this song I sing to her:
"Tomorrow morning if you wake up and the sun does not appear
Ah-ha-ah, I wil be here.
If in the dark we lose sight of love, hold my hand and have no fear
Ah-ha-ah, I will be here.
I will be here when you feel like being quiet
When you need to speak your mind
I will listen, and I will be here
When the laughter turns to crying
Through the winning, lo - sing and trying
We'll be together
Cause I will be here.
Tomorrow morning if you wake up
And the future is unclear.
Ah-ha-ah, I will be here.
Just as sure as seasons are made for change.
Our lifetimes are made for years
So ah-ha-ah, I will be here.
I will be here, you can cry on my shoulder.
When the mirror tells us we're older
I will hold you and I will be here
To watch you grow in beauty
And tell you all the things you are to me
I will be here.
I will be true to the promise I have made
To you and to the One who gave you to me.
I will be here. "
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