Testimonies
One day the realization that I did not fully trust God with my life hit me like a ton of bricks. I was exposed as an imposter. My life was flashed before me like a bad movie. The main character was self: self-centered, self-control, self-reliance, self-absorbed, and selfishness.
At that moment my spirit hit rock bottom. The truth had awaken me from that terrible dream of living in false trust. It had been a trust I believed I had only when I felt I had some level of control in regards to my health, my family, my job, and my finances. After all, I ate right and exercised. I spent quality time with my family. I went to work on time. I received my paycheck every two weeks.
I really just never took the time to examine my level of trust in God. I am ashamed to admit that though I quoted Proverbs 3:5, I did not practice it. I was a Christian that walked by sight, not by faith.
When the Holy Spirit convicted me of this truth, I became as one in deep mourning. I mourned over my betrayal of trusting Christ totally and completely with every part of my life, good or bad.
Now I am on a quest to put my trust in him, not because I’m now in a place where I have to, but because I want to please him and experience the fullness of joy in placing my life totally in his hands.
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