Humor
LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE As A Member OR Visitor
Message Writer
Hire Writer
Report Article
“Are You a Bot,
LORD?”
“No.”
“I bet You don’t even know what a ‘bot’ is.”
“I know everything,
schpeil`tah.”
“Mozel tov.”
“Sarcasm,
child.”
“I’m not being sarcastic, LORD.
It means ‘congratulations’?”
“I know you,
Joa`ch`kalah.”
“There’s not much to know.
I’m from Northwest Philly, I like cats, and I have a 9 year old car with a dent.
67 years, and there’s really not much else.
When I was 4 years old I saw President Kennedy and Robert Kennedy get out of a helicopter on the White House lawn. We all waved. My mother almost fainted.
When I was 5 I got my picture in the Philadelphia Bulletin when we went down to see the Phillies come back from a winning game at the airport.
Once I saw a wolf-spider on my patio. I never saw a spider that big. You could’a put a leash on him.”
[SMILE.]
“Did You hear about that guy who just climbed Mount Everest for the 17th time?”
“I Was There, child.”
“Gutz`eh`danke.”
“You’re being sarcastic again,
schlupt`kah.”
“I’m from Philly, LORD. It comes naturally like those sherpas can scale ice mountains.”
[SILENCE.]
“You probably think they’re a lot more exciting.
More fun to watch.”
“I’m not in front of a television,
child.”
“Sure Ya are. Munching popcorn from a big gold bowl. What d’Ya drink, LORD: beer…. coke?”
[SILENCE.]
“What’s up on Mount Everest, anyway. And how do you go to the bathroom: scaling that mountain of ice and wearing that breathing contraption.”
[SILENCE.]
“Plus….your, eh….skin…on your behind, eh..…get frostbite? What do ya do: sit on one’a those icy crevices?”
“It’s a risk,
Julbie.”
“Ha, ha!
It would be like that scene in “The Christmas Story” where that kid had a bet from the other kids to stick his tongue on the icy telephone pole, and the school had to call the fire department?”
[SMILE.]
“Great movie.”
[NOD.]
“I run out of non-verbal responses for You, LORD.
How many times can I say [CHUCKLE], [FROWN], [SMILE], [NOD], or [SILENCE]? Do You have any
suggestions?”
“You’re the writer,
Mein kin`der.”
“Yeah.
Right.
Like one day I’m gonna write a movie script and make a gazillion dollars.”
“Your life isn’t over,
Joach`ka`lah.”
“Neah.
It’s pretty much done.
The ship has sailed.
The boat has docked.
The canoe has flipped.
The raft has tipped.”
“Oy vey z’mir.”
“The surfboard has sunk.”
“How did it sink,
schlupt`kah`lah.”
“A shark bit it.”
“And
I Was
the Shark.”
PLEASE ENCOURAGE AUTHOR BELOW LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE AS A MEMBER OR VISITOR
This article has been read 79 times < Previous | Next >
Free Reprints
Main Site Articles
Most Read Articles
Highly Acclaimed Challenge Articles.
New Release Christian Books for Free for a Simple Review.
NEW - Surprise Me With an Article - Click here for a random URL
God is Not Against You - He Came on an All Out Rescue Mission to Save You
...in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them... 2 Cor 5:19
Therefore, my friends, I want you to know that through Jesus the forgiveness of sins is proclaimed to you. Acts 13:38
LEARN & TRUST JESUS HERE
FaithWriters offers Christian reading material for Christian readers. We offer Christian articles, Christian fiction, Christian non-fiction, Christian Bible studies, Christian poems, Christian articles for sale, free use Christian articles, Christian living articles, New Covenant Christian Bible Studies, Christian magazine articles and new Christian articles. We write for Jesus about God, the Bible, salvation, prayer and the word of God.