Healing

Sexual Deviance to Sexual Wholeness

by Honey Stone
12/09/18
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Sexual Deviance

Those who live in America know that you can’t walk too many steps into the World before you find sexual deviance. It comes in many forms and it’s not just in soap operas and R-rated movies. It’s on Social Media ads and posts and subtlety inserted into college classes. It’s taught to high school sex education classes and it’s on the billboards. Now you can even find it in children’s books.

It’s everywhere.

It comes in many forms and not just homosexuality. It is in any area of our life where we deviate from God’s original design for our gender and that expression.

Relational Healing

I went to a church that was heavily into the pastoral ministry of Leanne Payne. This is essentially inner-healing otherwise known as relational healing. Connected to her ministry is the teachings of Andy Comiskey who was once a practicing homosexual and now is as I quote: healed and being healed of homosexuality.

You don’t have to be a homosexual to have a broken sexuality. This church taught about the ‘true self' as well as ‘true masculinity’ and ‘true femininity.’ 

This church was a haven for the sexually abused (as many gay people have been) and sexually broken. There were addicts of all kinds including drugs, alcohol, sex, and you name it. It was a place for the mentally ill to become mentally stable.

It was a place where you can admit that you are broken and you can choose to recover fully. Or you can sit on the sidelines and go through the motions and NOT enter in. It’s your choice. Non-participation is true of any church. Just show up and lift your hands at the right times and put on a classic smile.

But real transformation happens to those who sat in the seats and cried for many weeks on end until the fruit of repentance and reconciliation appeared. The wheat and the tares sat together.

Sexual Wholeness

My path toward sexual wholeness started at the Andy Comiskey conference that I attended 20 years ago. He is the founder of Desert Streams and Living Waters ministries to help those with relational brokenness. It was an intense inner healing conference which included as much prayer ministry as it did teaching. Many prayer ministers ministered at that conference.

It lasted nearly a week, and after that and a session of deliverance through Light House ministry I could sense the presence and peace of God. No longer did I hear the rat-tat-tat of the occult familiar spirits that once plagued me.

One worship song that we sang repeatedly at that conference was All Who are Thirsty. It defined that experience. As we got freer and freer the worship became more powerful. You could hear the heart expressed through everyone. It became more emotionally expressive, potent, and easier to enter in.  Whenever I sing that song the memories of healing come and I am a puddle of tears.

Homosexuality 

Though I do not struggle with homosexuality, I’ve learned that every sexual deviance has similar issues.

I want to share a quote from Andy’s blog: skilled helpers help persons ‘to read’ their sexual desires properly; that involves helping clients (friendS) to recognize legitimate needs at the heart of same-sex attraction (or wrong sexuality), and to face painful relationships and traumas that may have contributed to the attraction (or fixation). Here therapists (or friends) function as healers of actual wounds that have divided lives and made persons more vulnerable to LGBT+ (erroneous) self-perceptions and behaviors, as in the case of childhood sexual abuse. (My contributions are in the parethesis).

Let me break this down. Typically, facing and healing painful memories are at the core of sexual recovery. Also, understanding your true God-inspired and pre-wired desires are the keys to sexual wholeness be it gay or straight.

Mother wounds and father wounds are places to explore to get to some of your heart’s unmet needs because God is both nurturer and provider. 

Anyone can be a minister of reconciliation to the broken as we help others to understand their true image in God.

Sexual Integrity

You can tell those who are recovered because there is a genunie humility but also the triggers of shame are gone. Once you really know you are forgiven then nobody can label you by your past even if they still think the same of you. You are truly free. Shame is no longer a part of your makeup.