Poetry
(This is is not toward anyone in particular)
I am a Woman Artist…Is that Okay?
Actually, I am not asking for your permission, just your understanding. My highs may be higher than yours. My lows may be lower as well. And that may not be a flaw as you sometimes often quell.
It may just be a gift and it may be by design. Though, sometimes out of sync or out of rhyme, but I’m experimenting with a side of me that I usually hide - am I allowed to be imperfect?
Forgive me if I channel it in ways that makes you wince. In ways you don’t understand I won’t try to convince you of my value anymore. I am worthy of taking up space and breathing because of Who is in me and because He wanted ME to exist.
So, I ask you: Do your emotions fluctuate predictably three times a month from even to amplified to exausted? Do you give my gender any grace? Or must I be more like a man Henry Higgins?
For I am learning to be comfortable with all I am and sometimes that means making a mistake and being okay without a demand on myself to be perfect.
I see you want to change me. Though you like my femininity through its vulnerability But you want to control it according to your needs and preferences. But I am human; an individual and your needs are not above mine - they are equal.
You may try to change me in ways I don’t need to change. So try to refrain from doing me damage.
An artist is suppose to see more shades of white.
A musician is apt to hear more distinctions of sounds both good and ugly.
A dramatist is supposed to emote from the depths of experience and get the just right shade
A writer is built to be moved more profoundly by words
A dancer is wired to be more in tune with their body.
I have these feelings so I can express them through the arts with brushes and pens through voice and through pretend.
So, no, I won’t change but I will grow if you give me grace and safety and space and acceptance.
Nurture the good and heal the bad. But please, If you want to help me then truly help me Don’t hurt me. There are many Who don’t understand an artist’s soul; Who don’t care for a woman’s heart. Don’t be amongst the insensitive crowd. Be one of those who can discern whatthe true heart strings of a woman are.
www.propheticartstreams.weebly.com
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I am also a woman, an artist, a Christian writer, a sensitive person who has been hurt by a multitude of people. I school my teachers tried to place me in their "logical-mind" mold because they didn't know how to deal with creativity. My parents would not help me pay for college classes in art, which at that time, was the only area I was interested in. My dad persecuted me for many years, and I was persecuted at many job sites. I was abused by my first husband who was an alcoholic. I got divorced and raised two boys on my own. I tried to commit suicide but God stopped me because He loves me. God made me the way I am because it pleased Him--and so do you. In the beatitudes in Matthew chapter 5 and in several other places in scripture Jesus tells us of great rewards He has for us. He also tells us that these bitter things we face because of Him in us, will be greatly rewarded in Heaven. We are to count it joyful when we suffer for His namesake because great is our reward in heaven. Sincerely, Robin Ulbredtch Faithwriter #63288
PS I have a poem that I'm working on that expresses the idea that everyone wants to change me to fit their mold. If I were meant to be like them, God would have made me that way.