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Running On Fumes? Empty?
I had never run out of fuel before. There is a first time for everything- right? I can still remember this experience clearly as it had a profound effect on me in a few ways- I clearly didn't know that fuel was my problem. I was in a hurry to get from our nursery's tree field to pick up my daughter at the bus stop. My suburban hadn't even reached full speed yet on the highway when a bunch of red warning lights suddenly lit up my instrument panel. Instantly anxious, I knew something was wrong, so naturally instincts told me to get off to the side of the road. After turning the wheel sharply towards the right I realized that my steering didn’t work as it normally did, but I worked hard to turn it in order to get off the highway and prevent an accident from happening. When I went to hit the brakes and noticed they didn't work either, I panicked. I was in trouble at this point and knew I needed to figure out something quick as I was now headed toward the ditch that ran along the side of the road. Without even thinking, I put the transmission into park and my suburban stopped abruptly within a few inches from the ditch. Most of my suburban was now at least off the highway. I sat there for a second trying to calm down as it happened so quickly- what was that I thought? I called my husband, Doug, who graciously answered but was tied up on business in town for a while. My brother-in-law came to my rescue and after he checked things out, the problem turned out to be that I was out of gas. Now, you may be thinking I’m a fool for not knowing I was out of gas, but let me fill you in on why I didn’t know. For about a year prior to this happening, my fuel gage indicator had been malfunctioning. I could be sitting in park with the suburban running and could watch the indicator go from full to empty, then float back up to read the level at being half of a tank. I mentioned it to Doug and he figured it was probably the fuel float indicator going out inside the gas tank. He didn’t have the time to investigate and fix the problem at that point, as it was harvest time on our farm, but he assured me that if I set my trip odometer each time I filled up that I could track the approximate fuel level. He knew about how many miles I could get on a tank of gas. I knew he would look at it and fix it when he had some time. I wasn’t thrilled about this way of operating- but it worked, for a long period! An entire year passed. Let me assure you, I got really consistent at checking my trip odometer every time I got into my car. For preventative measures, I trained myself to pull into the farm to top of the gas tank to make certain I didn’t run out. The experience of running out and having my vehicle completely malfunction was one that I didn’t care to have happen to me again. As far as I was concerned, it seemed better to run on the full side. To be honest, I hadn’t ever really given much thought to what a car did when it ran out gas, other than thinking it would be inconvenient. I didn’t think about all the components of a vehicle that would be affected- but I got to experience it. Loss of power steering and brakes and everything ceasing- that was enough to enlighten me. I’m certainly glad that I wasn’t on the interstate or a steep hill when this experience happened or I might have had more of a story to tell- perhaps one that didn't end well. The blessing and teaching for me was that God seemed to use this experience to remind me to check in with him. Each time I pulled into fuel up, in whatever state of mind I was in, I always sensed the Holy Spirit impress on my heart that I needed to come and spend more consistent time with him - not just when I was in a crisis or needed something, but just because I loved him. In today's busy world, we need several reminders, don't we?! This shouldn't discourage us, but cause us to be grateful that the Lord relentlessly loves us and draws us to himself. I believe that as we learn and grow in our faith, we gain insight and understand even more so that we are desperate for him and our crave for him increases and we want to be filled - always! As I processed this experience a scripture found in John 10:10 came to mind - The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. This is beautiful isn't it! Jesus came to give us life to the full! I've come to realize in my own journey, that when I don’t personally spend some time in prayer, reading His word, and just taking a moment to be still and listen, I tend to malfunction more often - just like my car did. My awareness needed to become more heightened to the signals that indicated that I was running on fumes or even worse, running on empty in my spiritual life so I would remember to return to the Lord, the one who redeems, satisfies, and fills.
Thoughts to ponder: Are you running on fumes? Can you think of a current incident that the Holy Spirit used to prompt and remind you of a truth that needs your attention? It’s important for each of us to nurture our relationship with the Lord. He does the filling, our part requires that we come to him with a heart desiring to let him fill us with what he has for us. Have you filled up today?
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